Relationship Lost :(

[Melle]

I'm a new member to the site and haven't posted anything before... but after today, I just feel lost.

My bf has PTSD and its wrecking our relationship. We've known each other for 15 years and have always been close. We could never be in a relationship for a variety of reasons but finally got together 2 years ago. While we normally should be ecstatic to finally be together, we've had to deal with one hardship after another, and I think its making his PTSD come out in full force. The past couple of months have been especially difficult, with personal and financial struggles, and we pretty much live like roommates now. We talked about everything today, and he mentioned that he might leave because we aren't happy. I always thought we could conquer anything, especially since we both gave up so much to be together. I can't imagine just giving up after all that.

We've gone through most of what others have posted about on here... emotional roller coaster, not talking, lack of intimacy, etc. and he is just now dealing with his PTSD, so its new for both of us.

With the though that he could leave, I just don't know what to do. I wonder what I could do to be a better gf, and he says its not me. So why do I feel so lost? I can't even imagine life without him.

How do you other supporters handle times like these?

 

[obee12]

My experience tells me you might have to expect an inevitable downhill spiral and breakup. This is sad yes, but anything less than a miraculous intervening experience probably won't fix what you have now. Try counselling first if you wish.

 

[Tswevnz]

I am no expert in love -in fact from from it .... BUT will share my experience.
My ex partner and I overcame massive hurdles to be with each other - trust me - having heritage from the two most opposite countries in the world , was NO walk in the park. We also lost things together that broke our hearts.
As a result I stayed in the state you are in now.....

"Is this it ? But we fought so hard to get here....I'll try harder. What was the point of all that hardship then "

However the conclusion I've come to after 3 years in that miserable state ( after we we'll and try ruined each other and any potential friendship ) , if being miserable was all I gained after all the struggle to be with him ....
Then it wasn't worth it.

Maybe you where drawn to each because of the fight and it got u a connection - but when it comes down to the basic everyday relationship - the right ingredients maybe weren't there?

I wish you all the best - it's a horrible situation - whatever happens , I hope you will be happy.