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Poll Major Announcement At The End Of A Session/how Did You Handle It?

Has your therapist announced something major at the end of a session? How did you react?

  • never happened

    Votes: 7 21.2%
  • Has happened, I wasn't worried because I knew we could talk about it later.

    Votes: 3 9.1%
  • Has happened, I was distressed/worried until the next session.

    Votes: 11 33.3%
  • Has happened, had a major melt down.

    Votes: 9 27.3%
  • Has happened, other reaction.

    Votes: 6 18.2%
  • Did you decide that it was handled the best way possible?

    Votes: 5 15.2%
  • Did the incident have a long term good impact on your therapeutic relationship?

    Votes: 6 18.2%
  • Did the incident have a long term bad impact out your therapeutic relationship?

    Votes: 1 3.0%
  • Did it have no long term impact on your therapeutic relationship?

    Votes: 4 12.1%

  • Total voters
    33
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scout86

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There have been some changes going on at the place my T works out of. He told me when this first started and said all that it meant was that we'd find some other place to meet. He's been good at keeping me feeling like I knew what was going on. Two weeks ago, he said he'd found another office. Last week, at the very end of the session, he said that there had been a change in plans and he was closing his practice in the town where we've been meeting. He explained his reasons for the change and said, "see you next week". End of session.

It seems like I've seen a fair number of threads here about things, alarming, important things even, that get brought up right at the end of a session. Then we all go home and freak out until we either come to our senses, have a total melt down, or figure out a way to hash it out with our T. I'm beginning to wonder if this is something these people are actually taught to do for some reason. I brought this up with my T. His response (so far) has been that we have time to talk about it and the best time to do that is after I've had awhile to think about it on my own. (That might be true, if I had actually BEEN "thinking" instead of "reacting". I emailed him back and pointed out, if that was the way my brain actually worked most of the time, I probably wouldn't be seeing him in the first place. Too soon for a response just yet)

Anyway, I'm curious. In your own perception, has you T ever thrown something major/worrisome at you at the very end of the session and then left you hanging? If they have, how did you handle it? I'm really interested in hearing how things turned out. Did you come to decide that your T handled it the best way possible?

My plan is to share the statistics, at least, with my T. I'm looking at this as a teachable moment FOR HIM. And, perhaps, others?
 
Gosh! If my therapist were to spring something major on me at the end of a session it would be bad. REALLY bad. He told me about the issue with my insurance at the very beginning of a session and it pretty much destroyed the hour (and the last three weeks) I can't imagine what would happen if he were to tell me that at the end! I would have probably done something really bad to myself.
Poor form, I think, when talking to trauma patients.
 
Early on, my therapist told me at the end of a session he was going to be taking the weekend off - it was for a holiday, a normal time for people to take off work. But my insides shrieked. And I was seeing him 2x a week, so it wasn't even like I had to go longer than a week before I'd see him again. And then I thought I was over-reacting, and then I sat with it, and realized that my reaction was my reaction and I didn't need to judge it, that it was reasonable that he'd assume I'd know it was a holiday weekend, and that when he told me he also told me that I still should call if I needed anything, he told me when he'd be in transit and unreachable, and emphasized he'd see me in a week.

So, I thought he did it really well, I panicked anyway, but was able to process it. I still feel slight abandonment, I guess, when these things come up, but it's less and less over time.
 
My therapist told me that she was leaving for vacation in October during my anniversary time. I freaked out, but wouldn't tell her why. I eventually did and when we met she admitted that if she actually paused to think, she would not have said it at the end of a session. It took me a couple of session to feel okay about it. She hadn't planned on telling me then, but for some reason it just naturally came out. And then she wished she hadn't, but since I didn't actually react to it or say anything, she couldn't tell how badly it had affected me. I couldn't imagine what I would do if she sprung what your therapist sprung on you at the end of a session!
 
Whenever I have a really difficult session, I usually try to hangout with a friend or loved one who knows about my past and can kind of "watch" me. I usually have my best friend hangout with me and he lets me talk about whatever is on my mind or he will happily distract me.
 
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my T would give an announcement immed. at the start of a session b/c she is very skilled and very aware.

T's that do it at the end are sloppy and ill-trained, i think.
 
My therapist announced that she was moving on to another practice, that it was to help women who had been told they needed breast cancer surgery or were undergoing treatment for it or who had, had it. Since I was not one of those kinds of patients, I could not continue with her. We had a few weeks to discuss it and then she would be gone. The only other therapist who worked where she had been working was a man, so I knew I would not be able to go to him. I cannot deal with the idea of a man being my therapist and the one time I tried it, it did not help.

I had an anxiety attack when she told me, if I recall. During the remainder of our sessions, I think I felt cramped and not really able to fully express my feelings about it. I wanted to be happy for her, as it was a promotion for her within the healthcare system she was working in. At the same time, I felt bereft. I didn't know where to turn.

I finally found another woman therapist, and things eventually did work out, but it was not easy. I sometimes still miss that first therapist, as I had been with her for about 5 years. I tried to reach her once years later, I forget why now, but she did not respond. I still miss her, even though I am pleased with my current therapist.
 
There have been some changes going on at the place my T works out of. He told me when this first started...

I've only done this weird spiritual therapy called Sozo .. And they spring bad stuff on you the whole time. They get you to relive your trauma and don't offer any therapy. It made me physically ache for months.
 
Last year I remembered sexual abuse from my childhood, told T, three sessions later she told me I had to have a break from therapy (didn't want to, didn't agree but had no say in the matter). Had a meltdown, had no support. She didn't even refer me to someone else. Just totally abandoned me. I now think she might have done it partly because she couldn't handle what I had told her and partly because I wasn't comfortable going into detail about the abuse with her. NHS, I think if you're not making progress they just get rid of you for a while. (in my case, sixteen months). :arghh;
 
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