I've been working with a Somatic Experiencing practitioner (as described in, 'Waking The Tiger') for several weeks now (along with my regular counselor and EBT [Emotional Brain Training] work) and lately I'm noticing that I'm much more present and 'in my body'. I'm more accepting of the times when I'm afraid to be present or can't concentrate enough to meditate. I'm becoming more gently persistent with myself rather than acting like a drill sargeant.
I recently had what I call a Helen Keller moment (remember when she's at the water pump with her teacher and, after months and months of her teacher spelling words into her hand, the light bulb suddenly goes on and she says, 'w-a-t-e-r'?) and it hit me on an emotional/limbic brain/gut level that maybe the world is not as scary as my brain tells me it is. On a mostly subconscious level, I've viewed the world mainly as potentially hostile and dangerous. I'm toying around with the perception that perhaps it isn't. Perhaps it's more neutral - more at the middle point: there is safety, there is danger, there is pain, there is joy. Sure, intellectually I acknowledged all this a long time ago, but this is beginning to happen on a deeper, almost physical, level.
I'm also appearing to be less fearful of happiness (my brain has pretty much always followed the old idea of "the higher you go the harder you fall" -- so better to stay on the damned ground!). The image that comes to mind is a mole poking its nose out of its hole after a long-ass winter, checking if it's safe now to come out....
Just wanted to share, especially for those still deep underground and thinking that the tunnel goes on forever....
-Dylan
I recently had what I call a Helen Keller moment (remember when she's at the water pump with her teacher and, after months and months of her teacher spelling words into her hand, the light bulb suddenly goes on and she says, 'w-a-t-e-r'?) and it hit me on an emotional/limbic brain/gut level that maybe the world is not as scary as my brain tells me it is. On a mostly subconscious level, I've viewed the world mainly as potentially hostile and dangerous. I'm toying around with the perception that perhaps it isn't. Perhaps it's more neutral - more at the middle point: there is safety, there is danger, there is pain, there is joy. Sure, intellectually I acknowledged all this a long time ago, but this is beginning to happen on a deeper, almost physical, level.
I'm also appearing to be less fearful of happiness (my brain has pretty much always followed the old idea of "the higher you go the harder you fall" -- so better to stay on the damned ground!). The image that comes to mind is a mole poking its nose out of its hole after a long-ass winter, checking if it's safe now to come out....
Just wanted to share, especially for those still deep underground and thinking that the tunnel goes on forever....
-Dylan
