My Ex the Sociopath omg

[silverlinings1069]

My therapist confirmed my belief that I am married to a sociopath. My ex and I have been in the process of getting a divorce for 2 1/2 years (he wants to leave me with as little money as possible - yes quite the peach I married). It took me two hours to process what she actually said, even though I heard her when she said it. From the description I gave, she asked me if I thought so. I burst into tears and told her about my struggle to get anyone to believe me. That I was trapped. But no one. Everyone loved him. Loves him. I had no idea how deep that trauma went until now. And now I can admit my fear is real and work through. That souless husk of a human does not belong in my mind anymore. whew....

 

[Deleted member 42984]

I hope things improve for you.
Is it like the fear of escaping a prison? There's a syndrome called the Stockholm syndrome, which may be overapplied sometimes to trauma survivors, but it DOES make some sense. The fear sounds like a good sign -- you're working towards freedom.

 

[silverlinings1069]

@ziter Thank you. My initial fear - that he will somehow know I got someone to hear me and he will retaliate. I know that is not possible (him finding out) but I have been stalked by him in the beginning of the divorce. (I have stalked a lot in my life.) Fortunately, my lawyer knows and I have video. He backed off after that. I am going to email my lawyer when I can think straight and write coherent sentences. Concurrent fear - my son has half of his genetics and has been trained by him from birth not to like, trust, or respect me. I have worked hard to fight that and I think I am winning a bit. Now the fear is a bit like escaping a prison. I am aware Stockholm Syndrome. And I'm a bit sick to my stomach. I do think the fear is good. It has a name and a face. And now I can process that nonentity out of my mind. I have swallowed this fear for 16 years. The day we married he changed. Like a light switch. Screw him. I know this fear wont last. I will process it. Hopefully overnight. My brain is pretty fast at this stuff. Holy cow....still in a bit of shock.

 

[Deleted member 42984]

Holy cow....still in a bit of shock.

Yeah, it's understandable. You'll get through this!

 

[silverlinings1069]

(I have stalked a lot in my life.)

Typo i have BEEN stalked a lot.