My gf

[sonicwhite]

my gf has been sexually assualted 600 times.

I’m trying to understand. She was with her ex for five years. She would always say no but he continued to assault her. She doesn’t have nightmares but she is def traumatized by what she endured.

I think there’s a beating wife syndrome. She was scared to be with him and was afraid to leave. After five years she left.

She came to the cross and God is helping her. We met in Christianforums. She has always been so sweet to me.

I want to understand what she goes thru so I never gurt her.

I’m honored to be with her and I’m awaiting Gods plan for our lives. Out of the ordeal she has two beautiful children.

She said she would go thru all of that just to have her two babies. I’m thankful I have found such a loving person.

 

[BlueAquarius]

Going through something like that can make a person fearful of trusting others. So just take it as slow as she needs and dont push her to talk about it (i have no idea if you are) and just be patient with her. The best thing you can do is be there and listen. Kudos for wanting to understand and it sounds like you really care for her. Also I really hope she is seeing a therapist. There are some religious ones and even a non religious one can help her. I dont know her, I just find it's very common to go through a grieving thing after trauma (sometimes right away or years after) and sometimes a therapist can help guide through that. I hope this helps.

 

[sonicwhite]

She’s just now opening up and she only feels comfortable talking to me.

I’m encouraging her to go to a therapist. Their the only ones that will work with her the way she needs.

I’ve been thru my own trauma so I know first hand what needs to be done to heal. I’m proud of her never using drugs to cope.

She just wrote me a long message of what she endured. She blames herself and sometimes falls in the self indicting denial. I hope she heeds my want for her to get the right help.

I’m always there to listen.

 

[Sweetleaf]

my gf has been sexually assualted 600 times.

I don't think the number really matters. Once is too many. If I were to put a number on the number of times for me... ugh.. there's no point sticking a number on it. 600, 1000, 2000? Doesn't matter the number.

I want to understand what she goes thru so I never gurt her.

Basically I agree with what @BlueAquarius said. Take things slow. Let her bring up the subject, let her be the one to share what she feels like sharing. Listen to her, be aware that she may have trouble with physical touch and intimacy related things sometimes. Do that sort of stuff at her pace. Totally agree on the trust issues bit - that's a huge thing for me, personally.