I was diagnosed with OCD 14 years ago. I have had this disorder since I was 11 years old.
I had intrusive thoughts. I was also afraid of germs and washed my hands so much they would crack and bleed. I had to wash cans off with soap and water before I opened them. I even threw 5lbs of sugar away because I thought it might be contaminated with bug spray. I was afraid to shake hands with elderly people, in case I had germs on my hands, because it might kill them. I checked to make sure the door was locked so much it became loose. I could go on and on.
I knew they were irrational thoughts and behaviours, but I couldn't help doing and thinking them. I was almost non - functional at times, and certainly couldn't hold a job down.
I now take medication for OCD, depression, and ADD. I am a totally changed person! Such relief I experience, although I do struggle somewhat from time to time.
My T said the abuse, both sexual and otherwise, changed the way my brain circuitry works. I probably had a propensity from genetics for these disorders, but it was triggered by the abuse. I find brain chemistry so very interesting. I truly could not make myself be any otherway.
I thank God for the medication and therapy I have had. Without either, I would not be where I am today!
