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Planned Hospitalization At Sheppard Pratt

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Laurie2001

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Hi guys,

I really need help on this. I feel my symptoms are just too out of control and am very despairing about getting better despite doing lots and lots of work. So I'm considering a planned hospitalization at Sheppard Pratt. I'm not even sure if they'll take me because it seems like you have to be pretty suicidal. I have recently cut - hardly, have SI but wouldn't do it. But have a ton of other symptoms.

Anyway, I really like what the program offers a lot. My main fear/terror is being locked up and not having control over my things - an my anxiety medication. I'm terrified of that. I'm not a material oriented person or a control freak. Its just the overall control factor. Can that in and of itself be damaging or traumatizing? Maybe as I say this now, the idea triggers not having control in bad situations when I was a kid.

Have others of you been there? Were the staff kind? If I get overwhelmed by everything and freak out emotionally because the lack of control is scaring me will they help me through it.

Thanks for your help because i know I can't go on like this and am feeling so hopeless, this seems like it could be really constructive, but as I said I'm terrified.
 
Sounds like you know you need this kind of care. Do you have a place to store your things while you are away? I understand about not wanting to be locked down, and yet knowing you have to do what it takes to get yourself centered...
I support your self knowledge that it is time to seek more help. Things can be replaced. You can not be replaced. And it is very normal to be terrified. If at all possible, ask as many questions as you can before going thru with it. Hopefully it will settle your anxiety some. Hoping for a good outcome for you. Keep us updated. Hugs if you accep them.
 
This is an older thread - Sheppard Pratt - but it has some very specific information. Hard to know how much of it is still completely accurate, but I think it will give you a slightly better picture (if you'd not seen this thread already through doing a search).

My main fear/terror is being locked up and not having control over my things - an my anxiety medication. I'm terrified of that. I'm not a material oriented person or a control freak. Its just the overall control factor. Can that in and of itself be damaging or traumatizing?
It will be stressful, but I don't think you need to be concerned about it to the point of it being highly damaging. I've been in other hospital situations where I didn't have access to my psych meds, they were controlled by the hospital staff. In my experience, it just forced me to get over my personal fears about 'bothering' people.

In a specialized psych unit, like Sheppard Pratt, while you do need to accept that you are handing over a lot of personal control in order to be in a managed care environment - you are gaining a managed care environment. Meaning, you won't be over- or under- utilizing meds, you'll be gaining skills, and I do believe this program still has a very solid reputation for providing support whenever you need it (their chairs system).
 
Thank you both for your responses. I appreciate what you are saying about what is to be gained by a managed care environment, which is why I want to go. I know I need the skills desperately and I need a place where I can get them and deal with some issues without having to address anything else in my life. Last week I cut for the third time in my life (I've done other self harm stuff) and so my therapy, although good, is bringing up more than I can handle (as was a recent contact with my mother). I felt so despairing and just like collapsing inside. I have never been hospitalized so there is both this longing to have all this help and a terror at the same time. Of course then there's the coordination with work and my daughter whose 11. I am really hoping I can coordinate it with her being at camp. She's going away for the first time so I don't feel I can leave before she does because it would be too scary for her. Anyway, that's a separate issue but also makes it scary.

Anybody else's experiences there would greatly be appreciated.
 
I too am looking to the trauma unit at SP. I know there are older threads about it, but things change so fast in hospitals. has only been there recently who is will to share their experience?
I'd be coming from chicago, so it's a big scary commitment to do treatment so far from home.
 
Hi coffeandcats (love them both). I actually was accepted and am now waiting to hear about insurance and whether I can start right in the end of June to coordinate with my kid's camp. I worry about if things have changed too. I will say that I know of someone - don't know her well though - who was really breaking down after all this past trauma started to hit her and it was definitely helpful. My therapist says its more DBT oriented than in the past but that's what I think I need - learning the coping skills. But I know its really scary especially coming from far away. I'm a wreck about it. But know I need it.
Hope we get other responses too : ) about recent experiences. Looks like I will be going so will definitely post when I get back.
 
Hi coffeandcats (love them both). I actually was accepted and am now waiting to hear about insuranc...

Hi Laurie! I actually just went as well, we probably just missed each other (I started 1st week of Aug). Thanks for your response. I was there for about 3 weeks.

I just wanted to add my experience here incase others are wondering. First I LOVED the program. It's truely unique. I'm a psychologist (pardon the irony) and have worked in a lot of hospitals and a top rated residential. And this program is better than anything at addressing trauma, flashbacks and disassociation than anything I have ever seen. ALL the staff from the overnight mental health workers to the full-time day staff and therapists are amazing, well trained, and passionate about what they do (which is super rare to have EVERY staff be top notch). In 2 session my therapist there managed to get right to the deepest darkest more painful core of a lot of issues, and I definitely had several revelatory sessions with her, and while I feel like my home therapist is great and I could do that with her, doing it inpatient is much safer as doing such hard, intense work can be very destabilizing.
I had several times where I was crying uncontrollably after therapy, or during/after a flashback, and the staff were so patient and caring of me during it. One MHW spent nearly 45min with me once b/c I was so disregulated, she just helped me come down and helped me talk through it (not process though,dont do that with the MHWs), and I never felt rushed like she had something else she needed to do, which Im sure she did b/c they always have stuff to do. But that's how this place is, Pt's come first (unless theres a safety issues elsewhere on the unit, then thats 1st). My mind was truly blown by the care given here.

The program is pretty DBT, but not as much as a lot of places, there's only 2 1hr DBT groups a week. Which was fine by me, as I taught DBT groups 10 times a week for over two years. After that first group my therapist gave me an "individual focus plan" for me to get out of the group and work on my own stuff.
A lot of there skills are very Sheppard Pratt, they're skills you've probably heard of or done before but SP presents them a but differently and that really worked for me. The therapists and doctors tend to be more psychodynamic and psychoanalytic (which was GREAT for me).

They really do individualize the program for each Pt. A lot of Pts there have DID or were diagnosed with DID, but even not having that myself I was really able to relate to the other's and we gave each other a lot of support.

On a shallow level, I found the accommodations really nice, a private room with a huge window (or some have 2 or 3 windows), the unit is in a historical building and they kept all the homey charm when they renovated so it doesn't feel like a hospital, to me anyway. The shared bathrooms are well maintain and they have 5 open during shower times so no one had to fight for a shower, even when the unit was at 20 (it's current capacity). The food is ok, not great not terrible, but I'm a pretty plain basic eater with an unsophisticated palate, lol. Some stuff sucked, but there's a lot of snacks and usually always something to make PB and J if you really can't stomach your tray. You do meet with a dietitian and she can help you figure out what you might like best and will write in things for you. You can have your own pillow and a basic MP3 player and speaker, which is crazy chill rule for a hospital! I found their restrictions on items way more lax than anywhere I have worked or any other place Ive been a Pt.

The first group is usually at 10AM (goals), a couple days a week there's a group at 9am. (breakfast is at 8am and they'll kinda bug you a but by 830/840 if you're not up, but I'm a morning person so that was NBD for me). The wrap up group is at 730pm, so you have plenty of time to chill and get ready for bed.

I felt ready to leave when I did, but if me and my team wanted me to stay longer they would have fought for more days from insurance (I wasn't kicked out by insurance, I was just ready, thank goodness), they're really amazing like that.

If anyone has more questions just ask, I'd be happen to answer any! if you're on the fence I'd say take a deep breath and jump for it. If you're like me you'll lilky never feel ready, never have "enough" information, I sure didn't. I was scared out of my mind and had to get an extra Rx from my doctor to get there (flying from out of state). I never thought I'd do it, but I'm so glad I did.
 
I've been reading different threads and found this one which has more current reviews. Had I any doubt about going to SP I don't now. Everyone on here I can relate too. Last spring or maybe it was late winter I found out about SP. I found only 3 places in the USA who accepts my ins and offers this intensive inpatient treatment.

I've lived my adult life going to Outpt therapists and several times hospitalized for 3 or 4 days to be sent back home with the same issues. Never has the core issues been addressed and my symptoms are treated with meds and since the loss of my husband I have regressed terribly. Today is the day he was diagnosed with cancer two years ago and because of my early childhood traumas I have decompensated from where I was before the horrific way he died. I was so brave for him and he died in my arms where I felt his last 2 heart beats but I can't get past these memories.

We were married 25 years and it was like he rescued me after we dated. He was the first man I ever let close to me. Our adult son is with me and w/o him I don't think I'd be here. I am afraid of everything. I don't leave our home much or my bed. The depression medicine works until I have a trigger and it can be one from when I was a child or teenager.

My son and I have talked this over again and I have finally accepted I need serious help b/c living the way I am is slow suicide. The pain inside is to much to bare. My psychiatrist has referred me and the paperwork is in motion. I'm frightened to be so far away from my son. I am states away but he is my only child and I have to get better. He can't have an only parent like this. So, if they accept me I will go.

I'm very relieved I found this forum. It has alleviated fears and given me hope.

Thanks
 
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I'm glad NightOwl! I know having as much info is possible helps, at least it does for me. :)
It truly is a wonderful program, everyone has their own experience, and there will be ups and downs, but it is one of the best, if not the best out there. best of luck if you get accepted! the best thing to do is just jump in.
As an update I've been home for almost 3 weeks now and this is the longest I have gone in the last 3 years without suicide being on my mind nearly 24/7, and I'm still experiencing fewer PTSD and dissociation symptoms than I have in the recent past.:) Going to SP isn't the only reason I'm sure as I also have a great outpatient team and I've worked my butt off, but I know going to SP is a huge factor as to why I'm still doing better.
 
I really hope pratt takes me, the are among the best, and PIW has a bad rep on its other units, I have found little about those who went to thecenter the call it (trauma unit).

While I have SI, I also have excellent control to not go beyond that. What I need is for them to help deal with the flood of flashbacks I have. I can't watch TV, even some things on the internet trigger me (even in these forums use of the words trigger me). I need them to help me regulate them so I can function.
 
I hope you get in! I think you can have SI, escpially if it's passive, I know I certainly did, in fact one of my goals was to work on the chronic suicidality. I became slightly more actively suicidal while there, but still able to rely (heavily) on staff, so no need to drop my level or transfer, I think they try really hard not to transfer you to the crisis unit. Fingers crossed for you hurtingbadly! I found that one of the best things about SP TDU was that of course I got triggered or had har dtherapy sessions that if I was outpatient would have landed me in the ER, but there it wasn't about avoiding the triggers but rather when I WAS triggered seeking staff support to learn new and better ways to cope....I dont think I'll ever be rid of my triggers, but I can get better handle on them, and I have...they still bother me but no longer send me into intense flashbacks. Good luck! let us know if you get in! sending good thoughts your way,

PIW thats the Center in Washington? I used to hear really great things about them, but I think since Dr. Marylene Cloitre became less involved it's slipped in quality, but I have never been there so I can't speak to that place.
 
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