I get really confused when I try to categorize why whatever-happened when, and what caused it. It's too frustrating for me, and usually ends in tears. I wish I could and quite frankly envy those sufferers who have it together enough to be able to be able to be that far. It's quite lovely for them.
I only answered because I wished you to know that sometimes, just sometimes, the memory comes back. 20 years out, for some reason, I'll get the gift of some lovely little thing which has been missing for years and years having to do with my daughter's infancy. It usually comes at the tag-end of some thought process I've been mulling over and slides into my head. It's happened several times in the last 5 years or so as she's done 'big' things in high school and college. I don't know why.
I'm not saying it's all there because it's not. The unexpected moments might happen for you as well, though, since these strange times keep occuring out of the blue for me. I hope so, since there doesn't seem to be any concrete method of recalling our lost past.
Take care,
Anni
I only answered because I wished you to know that sometimes, just sometimes, the memory comes back. 20 years out, for some reason, I'll get the gift of some lovely little thing which has been missing for years and years having to do with my daughter's infancy. It usually comes at the tag-end of some thought process I've been mulling over and slides into my head. It's happened several times in the last 5 years or so as she's done 'big' things in high school and college. I don't know why.
I'm not saying it's all there because it's not. The unexpected moments might happen for you as well, though, since these strange times keep occuring out of the blue for me. I hope so, since there doesn't seem to be any concrete method of recalling our lost past.
Take care,
Anni
