Sexual Assault Memory Loss and Doubt: Was it Sexual Assault or Consent?

ezrats

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This happened my first year of college, and I've been wondering about it since then. I don't know how to "classify" it, and it just left me feeling horrible and dirty- I wanted to get other people's opinion of whether this encounter was sexual assault or consensual.

I was at a party at night in the woods, and met another student and we - we went off into the woods and started kissing, and then my memory cuts out- I think I dissociated. When I came to, I was in her bed the next morning, covered in bruises- but she seemed calm and was there with me. I immediately left and got a bus back home, and we never spoke again- I never got her name and I never saw her again. I don't even have proof that we had sex, but I was naked, so I assume we did. There was dirt in my underwear and shirt, so I assume we also had sex in the woods as well, but I don't remember any of it. I'm typically lucid when I dissociate, so it's plausible that I consented in the moment and just don't remember it. I typically hate people even touching me, but I went to that party with the thought that I MIGHT find someone to kiss (did not expect to have sex with someone).
 
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