Processing Trauma - Black And White Thinking?

[Abstract]

I tend to think that I have done zero trauma processing and yet I am starting to wonder if I am seeing this in slightly black and white terms.

Do others here see trauma processing as only when we delve fully into the gritty details of the trauma or is dealing with any of the outer rings that surround those details also legitimate processing? I hope that makes some sense.

I won't say more now and will wait to hear what others think first. Thank you.

 

[LisawithPTSD]

You gotta start in the outer rings. I have had this trouble too. I think I go pessimistic and feel I'm never going to get thru this stuff if I can't get rid of everything with the work I've done so far.

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

Do others here see trauma processing as only when we delve fully into the gritty details of the trauma or is dealing with any of the outer rings that surround those details also legitimate processing?

Yes I tend to also think that if I'm not talking about the details I'm not actually processing the trauma. It's like I don't know how else to think about it. I end up feeling like either my therapist and I are either discussing the details or we're spending time talking about possible coping mechanisms like distraction for example.

And distraction by the way is a frustrating concept to me on that idea. I mean yes at certain times it helps. But in the black and white thinking I feel like how is this different than pretending like nothing bad happened or is happening?

I feel like my trauma is so complex how can not discussing details help in kind of undoing some of the pain? I hope that makes sense.

 

[LisawithPTSD]

Its like the details are the little nuances that make it an ongoing trauma. Those are the things that trigger flashbacks for me.

 

[Venusian]

I tend to think that it is all tangled up together, the trauma and all the ways it affects your life. Learning coping strategies for the day to day stuff before you start getting to the root of the trauma can make the process much easier to handle.

 

[mamachick]

I seem to see the trauma processing as only when delving into it, but have come to remind myself that this is not the truth. For me, it is a tendency for black and white thinking. I would question that first. Are you any better than you were 2 years ago? Even seek the subtle differences. Look for any signs of progress.

CBT is used to treat trauma, yet it is cognitive behavioral therapy, the same that is used for irrational/distorted beliefs used to treat many disorders. It is a slow progress, I do know that, but even reading books that validate and keep me thinking on the right path are a success and part of treatment for me. Many things help to condition me back to health that I am not seeing easily.

 

[rightkindofme]

I'm going to agree that this is black and white thinking. All of your reactions to trauma are part of processing the trauma. Even the outer "easier" bits. You have to build a lot of trust and support before you can get to the most central issues. It is all part of the process.

 

[franciemarnie]

I say all trauma processing counts and is significant and contributes to healing no matter how distantly related to original trauma(s).

I kind of see it - and this is super simplistic but you'll get my gist - like imagining a rock (or nuke!) dropped in a body of water. Concentric circles emanate outward from center. If I should wade in from the outside and breach the margin of the outermost circle in the water, my movement effects the entire pattern created from the first drop of the rock (or nuke!) It breaks up the pattern.

I know that's over simplistic but I kind of see it that way.

You know how they say the nearly immeasurable impact to the atmosphere of a butterfly in flight can impact the state of the atmosphere and environment world wide. I see the same thing when we do anything no matter how small to undermine the violence to our system that the original trauma(s) wrought.

Everything counts - in my book anyway.

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

I see the same thing when we do anything no matter how small to undermine the violence to our system that the original trauma(s) wrought.

That's really profound. I think tor myself somewhere between the traumas and the technical medical terms and the diagnosis I think the word "violence" was lost.

When I think of it in terms of an abused dog for example I think I would be compassionate in my approach. And yet when it comes to myself I feel more cold and distant and demanding of myself. Sometimes when I try to be mindful of distorted thoughts I silently scold myself for having them.

I think there's a certain amount of self worth that comes into play for me when I consider I deserve kindness. Not just from other people but also from myself.

 

[DMerish]

Hi Abstract,

Although my childhood had a negative affect on me (due to not really having a mother figure in my life), the trauma that brought on my PTSD was being in a physically and psychologically abusive relationship. The result was a fear, a distrust, of men that are in authority roles, e.g. my current boss.

Do others here see trauma processing as only when we delve fully into the gritty details of the trauma or is dealing with any of the outer rings that surround those details also legitimate processing? I hope that makes some sense.

I spoke in therapy about details a few times - doing so, for me, didn't do much. I think the depth of needing to go into details depends on the person, their needs, what they are comfortable/what works for them. As for my issue mentioned above, I've been working on my distrust of men via my boss (although it's not something we've discussed) and I've come a long way. For that reason (if I understood your question correctly) I have to answer "no" - trauma processing, according to my definition, is not black and white.

Drew

 

[falling]

Interesting topic and even more interesting is the fact there are "votes" for both points of view.
I don't view anything to do with my trauma or my work on dealing with ANY aspects surrounding it to be in a black and white sense. I really like the ripple water metaphor that 'Franciemarnie' used. However, I am very close to my rock bottom and am feeling beyond overwhelmed with my PTSD right now so if I think I have made any progress AT ALL I am grateful and tell myself that I am taking steps in the right direction.

I also don't believe we can judge our 'progress' based on where we are today vs where we were years ago in with regards to our trauma/PTSD. I wasn't this bad since being first diagnosed with PTSD 12 yrs ago, but here I am again. So, does that mean I haven't made any progress?Does it mean I have moved backwards-in the BLACK?Does it mean I was 'healed' during the years in between now and 12 yrs ago-in the WHITE? No, for me it's all a grey area. For me anytime I learn more about myself and how my PTSD/trauma has effected/changed ME is progress.

I thought I had PTSD beat(please don't laugh). And then when I hit my more recent bottom I first thought that that meant I had not actually beat PTSD nor had I even made any progress but now I think I have made progress even if I find myself back in the pits of depression again. I am more confused now than ever and am desperate to learn ways to cope with my symptoms but I keep telling myself I am making progress because I am learning.

I tell myself if I can only 'deal with the outer rings' then that is still progress and every little bit helps.

 

[franciemarnie]

Falling - I just wanted to say I agree we cannot judge our progress sometimes and cannot accurately see necessarily what's going on in the present especially when it seems comparatively worse than years ago.

About 5 years ago, I found myself suddenly in the all time worst place. Dark, dark, dark. It was almost total darkness. This after decades of therapy, etc. It proved in retrospect to be a horrifying bottom from which I catapulted out into a light like I've never known. I'm still trying to understand how it happened. I like to think it was somehow cumulative from all the effort put forth thru the years.

Sometimes the dark night of the soul can precede unimaginable day. But when I was in the dark I wouldn't have found this conceivable. We cannot judge sometimes where we are until later. Just thoughts.