Questions

[BRK1996]

A back story of me: I was abused as a child from my neighbor. He also abused his brother that was my best friend growing up. Over the past couple years we lost contact. I reached out to him acouple months ago about what happened to see if we both could find closure. He didnt want to talk about it which I understand cause I dont talk to anyone but my therapist about it. So recently I found out he past away from a drug overdose. It didnt bother me too much til I went to the funeral. Its been a week and I feel so depressed. The person that went through this with me is gone and now its just me. I feel so lonely and guilty. I keep thinking there was something I could have done. Even though we grew apart as adults it feels like I lost a brother. And I just feel empty. I just dont know the best way to try to pull myself out of it. I've been reckless with my behavior on somethings and I feel so hopeless. Im not suicidal and dont want to hurt myself I just feel so down.

 

[EveHarrington]

My guess is that you’re going through the grieving process, which can be one hell of a ride. They say there are stages of grief, but in my experience I just bounce around and don’t go through it sequentially.

I think it would be a good idea to focus on self care and self soothing. Try to keep a schedule to your days, and engage in activities that you enjoy that will help you feel comforted.

I know you feel very alone right now. There are others out there who can relate to your trauma, even if they didn’t go through the exact same trauma as you. This is what helped me feel not so alone.

 

[BRK1996]

I just feel so guilty for some reason. I had this mentality that avoiding him would make it go away . When I heard I was okay but seeing him at the funeral just emotionally wrecked me. I felt so terrible .