Childhood Recovering from childhood violent sexual abuse - can you do it in a relationship?

[EveHarrington]

Does that include EMDR therapy? Maybe my trauma isn't that severe but I am under the impression that the 60 hours...

You undoubtedly have a lot of issues to work through so I say a big YES, trauma therapy will indeed upset your system and make your symptoms spike. I have never heard anyone say that relief started on day one of therapy and it was always getting better from there. This is not the nature of healing. It’s up and down and back and forth and inside out. I’m not doubting that you have found some relief with self EMDR, but please know that it’s imposd to process trauma on our own. The EMDR you do with a therapist will take you to places you could never go on your own. It’s the human input that is critical to trauma processing.

 

[TraumaticHealing]

@TraumaticHealing - are you also the person who posted as guest ‘what is this’ on this thread?

Yes, that's me, somehow I wasn't logged in and was wondering, what is this name field for?

Thank you, @EveHarrington - that is a very clear answer.

 

[Mach123]

Yes, I think you can or at least we have. It was very hard for everyone. We have been married 28 years. I first approached the subject of CSA in my forties so we had been married ten or twelve years at the time. I think you could very easily have made the case if we'd separated then it would have avoided a lot of bad things that happened? You can't do that though, you don't get "do-overs." There is nothing easy about it but looking around I don't see a whole lot of people having it easy. I could go either way here since I'm like that about everything. I could spend time talking about the good or the bad. I try to choose the good. It's not always there, sometimes I can't. I can try though. It's always worth a try.

 

[Deleted member 8714]

It is a heavy story Congruency. Do you get help / therapy or do you do it on your own?

No way could I do this alone. I've tried here and there because I couldn't find a Trauma Specialist. These kinds of therapists do make a difference. Day one with my new T helped me tremendously.

I stayed with one T for 14 years. During that time it took 4 years to heal from an abusive therapist. The rest of the time was spent remembering and integrating alters and parts. I had poly-fragmented DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder).

New memories surfaced 4 years after I was integrated and recently more alters and parts have emerged. That's when I discovered my main perp was a pedophile, a sadist, and a serial killer who forced me to watch him abuse, torture, and kill others. He was/is my father.