Responses To Your Therapist That You Will Probably Never Say

[Tanishq]

I felt that I wasn't worth anything but abuse

This is what I fear most time when I am going to build something new in my life.

Whatever you wrote in this post, it all relates to my problems. I hope sooner I find some help. Been searching for help from last year.

Thank you zaniara.

 

[VDWngr1355]

Me to T: "Do you actually live in the real world?!"

 

[rainy_daze]

Me: I think you're overworked.

 

[Jenfa]

Oh I got more. T= therapist M=me lol

T. Why didn't you call me when things were getting crazy for you?
M. ...I was crazy.

T. What I'm hearing sounds like the pattern you go through here and there, and these things do pass for you. You know that.
M. So.. you're fired and I'll buy a calender?

T. You would call me if you ever were tempted to self-medicate in a moment of stress, right? I hope we have that trust.
M. Hell no. You'd kill my buzz.

T. Have you thought about getting back into the dating scene? (with a longshot look of hope.. maybe?)
M. Why, so they can get all this and more?

T. I see this is bringing out a lot of emotion in you.
M. Yes. I could also see that, if I had a hand-mirror. It's called a frown, but I believe I've done it before.

T. Some out-patient programs are really helpful in transitional situations such as this.
M. I hope that wasn't a question.

T. Well, if out-patient is too structured for you to think about, perhaps taking a computer class or something?
M. Yes, because sitting next to SirnodsAlot and MissTake is way more pressure than learning Linux.

 

[zaniara]

T. What I'm hearing sounds like the pattern you go through here and there, and these things do pass for you. You know that. M. So.. you're fired and I'll buy a calender?

:hilarious: All of the things you wrote was hilarious!!

 

[zaniara]

Okay; I've written something similar to this before(to tired to go and look). Most things I've written here I've actually said. But I haven't said and won't say this :notworthy: :

Me: I'm not buying what you're saying. I can hear that it's only words. Please shut up. Can I go now? I don't want to be here. I'm not coping. And you don't seem to see that. Or care. You only say platitudes and then keep on pressuring me. Right now I just want to hurt my self or destroy something. Is it okay if I tear your book-shelf down and bang my head against the wall?

(Of course I know that I can go whenever I want to, but then again how will this treatment work if I do, right.. *sigh*)

 

[twopenny]

My middle name is "pain in the *ss".

Yeah, me too. My most commonly used word is 'why'. It winds up normal people in my life - when I finally get to see a therapist, it's going to drive them as potty as it did the ones I had as a teenager... :shy:

 

[Hashi]

Now that I'm seeing my therapist in her home, my unspoken responses are something like:

T: How does that make you feel?
Me: Is this your living room?

T: Because it makes me think of when you said x.
Me: .... or do you have a different room that you relax in?

T: I know that we've talked about y... That seems relevant here...
Me: Can't believe you would sit in this room in your time off... It's so sparsely furnished. But it's such a big room. Why would you use such a big room to see clients if you had other rooms you could use to see clients? Why wouldn't such a big room be your living room?

Me: Uh, sorry, could you say that again?

 

[Let It Be]

I e-mailed the counselor I have seen in the past several weeks ago to make an appointment because something had come up that had left me in a frenzy to say the least. She e-mailed me back that she was booked up and going on vacation for two weeks. She eventually called me and told me that the earliest she could see me would be towards the end of September! She talked to me in between her clients, like she called me at 1:40 and I knew that I couldn't talk long.

The last time she saw me and I was making another appointment, she immediately told me that she was going on a retreat, so wouldn't be able to see me for over a month. The month passed and I'm thinking, I guess I had to deal with everything on my own, but was planning to see her anyway when I received an e-mail from her. She was sick so was cancelling my appointment. I e-mailed her back, that I had nothing to talk about with her!

 

[Tanishq]

I e-mailed her back, that I had nothing to talk about with her!

I am glad you ended it all. I think she must be taking interest in those clients who she likes. She sounds very disrespectful counselor.

 

[zaniara]

He has his ways sometimes: which I'm learning to see through though(thus the struggle gets even worse sometimes, but in the end I always "lose": but I gather I win in some ways, since I guess he only wants what's best for me and want to help me):

T: You know, you don't have to do this. We will only do it if you want to do it. We don't have to do the EMDR if you don't want to. It's all about what you want. We can just talk instead. (He has always made me want to do the stuff he wanted me to do before by saying this, since he know I hate to be chickening out, since I'm so stubborn. But right now I am chickening out, for real.)
Me: Okay. I want to talk instead.
T: *trying to hide his disappointment* Okay.

Then he is just so evasive and difficult to have a conversation with, and also deliberately starts talking about triggering stuff so much that I panic and dissociates more and more. And after a while I understand that he won't be letting me get away with it; so at some point I actually starts begging to do the damn EMDR; just to get it over with. Then he irritates me at first with hesitating(like a someone who can't say yes, because he doesn't want to seem to eager): but then he finally complies.

T: You know the camera is just there because I need the input from my mentor, so that I can be a better therapist, and since it can be good for you to watch it later on. But it's all about what you want to do, and what you need, if you don't want to be filmed, I don't have to use the camera.
Me: I don't want to use the camera. I want you to move it. I've asked you three times to do so, but you just refuse to do it.
T: What is the problem with the camera? Why is it upsetting you so much? It's not even on yet.
Me: I just don't want it there beside you. Can you please move it to the other end of the room? (starting to be very agitated)
T: Has anyone filmed you in a bad situation?
Me: *shutting up and numbing out*
T: You know, it's all about what you want, what you need..
Me: I want to throw your camera out of the window and then go home, is that okay?

 

[Changing4Best]

I had arranged it so I was seeing her every 3 weeks and she changed it to every 4 weeks. I'm not sure she realized she did that or not, but I kindof wanted to ask why. Like am I really getting better, or...?