AdventureForLife
Learning
So glad to find this forum!! Had long thought I had PTSD but never had a diagnosis until last year when I turned 40.
Last year I nearly died after quitting drinking suddenly. (Was drinking WAY to much in excess to numb away the memories of past traumas/fresh pain etc)
So last year was the first time a psychiatrist ever spent real time to speak with me.
My diagnosis was given as only PTSD. She mentioned SSRI's could help, but relayed to her that I knew they make me suicidal so luckily was not forced to take meds that harmed me like they did in the past.
Have had a Kaiser therapist dump me when I said I was suicidal. She said I was fine and cancelled me from ever coming back. So I even have issues trying to get help.
Reconnected with an old friend at the same time as my diagnosis who also has PTSD.
I was surprised that she had been prescribed cannabis by a Dr. for her PTSD. Since smoking is not something I can do without intense pain, I tried gummies with THC/CBD and
it is the only reason I am able to go to bed happy, and wake up with hope now. (Living in California, it is legal or I would be too afraid to try!) OLLY SLEEP Melatonin has been a godsend to stop my night terrors that were always waking me up screaming "NOOOOO!", during a night terror that too closely mimicked my own life experiences. I know it's the OLLY that helps because as soon as I forget to take it, the waking up screaming comes back.
My work life is my most highly functioning aspect of my life. While I do enjoy life alone hiking/kayaking/cooking alone just fine... but ache for the safety net of just one safe close intimate partner. That search almost always winds up with another trauma experience. Had to call the police on the last fella that made me believe he wanted a long term relationship.
My mind and body is so tired from the fright or flight response I so often go through.
~Joy
Last year I nearly died after quitting drinking suddenly. (Was drinking WAY to much in excess to numb away the memories of past traumas/fresh pain etc)
So last year was the first time a psychiatrist ever spent real time to speak with me.
My diagnosis was given as only PTSD. She mentioned SSRI's could help, but relayed to her that I knew they make me suicidal so luckily was not forced to take meds that harmed me like they did in the past.
Have had a Kaiser therapist dump me when I said I was suicidal. She said I was fine and cancelled me from ever coming back. So I even have issues trying to get help.
Reconnected with an old friend at the same time as my diagnosis who also has PTSD.
I was surprised that she had been prescribed cannabis by a Dr. for her PTSD. Since smoking is not something I can do without intense pain, I tried gummies with THC/CBD and
it is the only reason I am able to go to bed happy, and wake up with hope now. (Living in California, it is legal or I would be too afraid to try!) OLLY SLEEP Melatonin has been a godsend to stop my night terrors that were always waking me up screaming "NOOOOO!", during a night terror that too closely mimicked my own life experiences. I know it's the OLLY that helps because as soon as I forget to take it, the waking up screaming comes back.
My work life is my most highly functioning aspect of my life. While I do enjoy life alone hiking/kayaking/cooking alone just fine... but ache for the safety net of just one safe close intimate partner. That search almost always winds up with another trauma experience. Had to call the police on the last fella that made me believe he wanted a long term relationship.
My mind and body is so tired from the fright or flight response I so often go through.
~Joy