Stalking Your Therapist

[scout86]

It is however pretty common to have an affinity of some sort or another for an empathizing person

I think that's especially true if you haven't had many people in your life who reacted to you with empathy.

 

[Scandinavgirl]

I think that's especially true if you haven't had many people in your life who reacted to you with empa...

I think you are right...

 

[GWhizz]

I can relate but I would advise that you tread with caution. My first T I developed this sort of attachment, transference, whatever you like to call it. I tried to address it with her but she dismissed it as something that would sort itself out. Though I never got to explain that I actually stalked her a tad online. I initially thought I was just being vigilant. But the more she gave, the worse I got as I really wanted her in my life as the mother I never had. I felt like I was special to her when I got a text or something as I knew she was going the extra mile for me as it was something she didn't do for anyone else. But fearful that she'd eventually give up on me and knowing that it was a therapeutic relationship, I broke it up myself. Very painfully and doing my best to ensure I totally sabotaged it for good. I knew it wasn't healthy. And it still hurts as I miss her. But with my new T I'm in a much better place. I'm actually working on what I need to in therapy. Not worrying about my relationship with the therapist. Sorry to go off in a tangent, just giving my experience on it. If you feel it's unhealthy you need to bring it up with him and go from there. I have deep attachment issues. If that T had of addressed the issue with me she may have spotted this and helped me with this very important issue.

 

[monkeytrial]

This is a bit embaressing, but since I`ve started therapy, I also kinda stalk my therapist online...

at one time i had a great therapist who had been seeing me professionally for almost 17 yrs. sometimes i felt empowered by things he'd say to me, like how i had a strong independent mind and things of that nature that i would cry. several times in fact. when he died his daunter invited all the long time patients to his home to remember him. not being jewish i was a little confused about it all. i showed up on the wrong night and all i did was cry. i also noticed everything he had told em about himself was true and corroborated by those in attendance. i secretly wished my real dad had been like him. i knew for sure it wasn't romantic on my or his part. once during the entire 17 yrs i looked up his home address. but i left it. he was dedicated to work. though a gp, he preferred cases like mine where a doctor can spend 45 minutes talking to a patient. he would tell me some personal things about himself and i felt like his confident which made me feel special and esp now as everything i so impersonal. he was like an old horse doctor type and I'm old school which made for a good team. hope this helps. it's normal to have feeling for them. but how far you take those feelings is where it can be seen as weird. you obviously have a moral compass and are using the forum for what its meant for--asking others if they can relate! i look forward to knowing you!!