Glad to hear you went.
he doesn't think I'm having panic attacks because I don't feel like I'm going to die
This is accurate, the words describing symptoms as used by professionals are very specific. (As specific as is possible to describe feelings.) Unfortunately the usage of words gets muddied pretty badly. A panic attack really does mean that you (erroneously) believe you are going to die in the next few minutes. Otherwise it is an anxiety attack.
Another example of this is addiction. You have probably heard or read people claiming to be addicted to drugs such as antideppressants (I'm guilty of doing this myself). It is incorrect. The way those drugs work, you cannot become addicted to them. You can form a dependency and suffer physically from a discontinuation syndrome when the drug is stopped suddenly, but it is not actually an addiction.
(Semantics, irritating but important.) Something to pay close attention to when being prescribed things such as antideppressants, especially if you are not planning to be on them for extended periods. Asking whether you will suffer discontinuation syndrome, is the question which will yield the answer you are looking for. (My GP is ESL. Her English is pretty good but it has been an issue a couple of times.)
without any info pages and in a bottle that isn't childproof (I thought there was a law here about that)
Not sure about the info pages, but the childproof thing isn't required. (at least not in Alberta)
The psychiatrist did go through with you about what the medication is called and how much you should take right? If so, it's probably legal. If you have questions about your medication, you can swing by your local pharmacy and ask them to give you the full details on it. (Since you got so little info, from a doctor who is ESL. I would highly recommend talking to a pharmacist. If for no other reason than to make sure you are able to afford it. You won't get it free often.)
Though it isn't uncommon for a doctor to have medication in their office. It's usually a promo thing from whatever company makes it, to be handed out to patients at the doctors discretion. The sample boxes they deliver to physicians/psychiatrists are usually pretty plain, just the name of the drug. The dosage guidelines are usually online with the provincial medical net service. (This is why you never see those giant medical textbooks at doctor's offices anymore.)
If you still feel uncomfortable taking it, don't. But It's probably all above board.
In case your doctor didn't explain to you. In Canada, psychiatrists do not do therapy. Their role is to diagnose, prescribe medication and write referrals. So they often come across as uncaring or akward. They ask about your experiences/symptoms/feelings for the purpose of gathering information to make a clinical diagnosis, then prescribe medication if appropriate. Any actual work you do as far as therapy, will be done with a psychologist. They are completely different fields. (I know, bloody confusing hey?)
Hopefully I cleared up some of your confusion. If nothing else I wanted to give you a metaphorical pat on the back for facing your fear today. :hug:
