What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[Srain]

(((((((((((((((((((Lion))))))))))))))))))))
I'm so sorry for pain. Take good care of yourself today, my Friend.


I had forgotten the day myself, I never forget to send my Son something but usually much in advance after that I tend to find myself totally ignore it, or do I?? All these years later it still can catch me unaware subconsciously.

Today I feel that same stomach pain I've been having but my mood is a bit subdued, hopefully it will be a good day.

 

[rainy_daze]

Today I feel happy/sad, happy/sad, happy/sad. One hour was great, the next bad, the next good, the next awful. Physically very unwell just now, which is contributing to the down times. The day is still young (and rainy) in Scotland though, so I'm going to get some tasks done indoors during the more motivated times - try and keep the hours as cheerful as possible too. I had some kind of nightmare that felt so real this morning, but I refuse to let it beat out/erase any of the happiness inside me. Grounding myself in reality, the here and now reality.

I won't ignore the sadness, but I'll tell myself that it'll pass and today can still be a good day... I know tomorrow, however, I will feel sad (I will probably post about that tomorrow instead of dreading the future just now). Enough with the me me me anyway, I noticed what you said PH,

Very lost and unsure of myself. Insecure.

((((PH)))) I hope you've found what you feel is lost and you feel 'found'.

It's always in the last place you look, ;). Seriously though, I hope you feel more secure soon/I hope you are having a better day, those can't be easy feelings to have.

 

[Philippa]

I'm really pissed off, and feeling powerless and don't know what to do about this rasta BITCH from hell who STILL won't keep her word.

Tonight she told me...again...that she would drop the payslips off to me on the way home from work. She even took my address and phone number to buzz me when she got there. It's now 12:18a.m and I still have not heard from her, and even left a voicemail message and an sms asking her to keep her word! Nothing...she is obviously not someone who has any honor whatsoever and can not be trusted to keep her word.

I don't understand why someone would keep saying they will do something as simple as printing out two goddamn payslips from the computer, and can't even manage that? Why tell a person you will do it for 3 weeks solid and then not do it?

I don't know what I can do except say to her that I don't understand why she bothers saying she will do something when she never does it, because she is one tough lady and admits to being crazy, having lived with a state champion kickboxer and held her own during abusive scuffles between them.

I wouldn't stand a chance if we were to get into a scuffle...plus, I don't actually want to get physical over this, but at the same time...:mad:

 

[amethist]

Have you thought of sending her a stamped addressed envelope Philippa, what excuse has she then not to send them to you.

Just an idea. :tup:

 

[Deleted member 12723]

(((Deb))) I am with you in spirit. I am sad you are going through this. How I wish you could get some good news, and that you would get the support you need. I hope that today has many gifts for you to help you to feel better. Hugs and prayers for you and for yours.

 

[Ice_Fire]

(((((((((big hugs to all who need them)))))))))) It seems as if many of us are hurting today :( :tdown:

I'm feeling scared and unsafe still.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I am feeling out of it today. I am realizing how much I split off from my childhood. there is so much I do not remember. It boggles my mind. I wish i could remember what is in the gaps. They say it comes up when you feel safe to cope with it.

The emdr is helping me to feel, I am able to connect some dots. I call that progress and I feel pretty good about that. The more I think about it, the more I am blown away by how little I remember. I split off so many years of my life.

I thought that when things calmned down and got quiet, the memories would surface. I guess I have to be patient with the emdr. I hope something kicks loose. I think this is why I am unable to cry. At least I can tear up.

 

[Spiderallis]

I'm pretty down today. Had a dream where I yelled out how one person's actions started a ripple effect to lead me into this, and I know I'll never say those things in the waking world. Instead I'll give him a card and say 'happy fathers day'. At least mom's gotten better enough to somewhat explain that he should be nicer to me when I'm not feeling well.

 

[Chincho]

I'm exhausted, but I'm also proud of myself because I survived lunch with my father. He is one of the causes of my PTSD.

 

[^^FlyingSolo^^]

((((Chincco))) :tup: for getting through it and being so brave!!!

I feel like garbage. I'm sleeping better now but that's all that's good. Everything else garbage. At least I'm awake enough now to focus on the garbage & not in a complete and utter disoriented fog of insomnia.

 

[lighteningdarkness]

I feel kind of good, I think this is for a number of reasons. I've managed to spend a number of hours with my parents who, whilst not responsible for the trauma, certainly gave little protective parenting. Also I've spent some time sitting by the sea which is good.

Most of all though, I don't know whether I'm going to be suspended and discipined when I get to work tomorrow or continue working. And the best bit is - that's not the most important thing for me now. The good feeling is that I've decided that I have to give all my love and support to me (how radical is that?) and I can't do this with the job I do.

It's a new decision and I'm kind of bouncing of the walls (in a good way) with it :)

I know that everyone else isn't feeling as good though. I send you loads of positive thoughts and support. I've only been able to make these decisions from reading your posts.

 

[Kathia]

I feel inbetween good but I miss intimacy in our relationship a his lack of talking.