What To Say And Not Say To An Alcoholic

[Recovery4Me]

I say this with firm conviction... yes, you do deserve happiness @Ayesha !!!!:hug:

Broke my own rule about leaving ....ooops.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I used to go with my husband to AA meetings to show support. I also went to Al Anon meetings but did not find them very helpful for my PTSD issues so I quit them.

I wish you well in this situation, hoping for the best possible outcome for you both.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

He seemed to reach a point in the last few days and asked for my support last night. He is taking about how he can't live like this anymore and he is starting to seek help. Including rehab. It is sudden and it is strong. I'm not sure of the cause but he is suddenly reaching out a lot. Tomorrow he calls one of the local rehab hospitals.

I'm not totally sure how to support him other then the basics of what I know about getting help. We both agreed he needs to do this himself.

I'm proud of him. He is trying to face it.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

He is going to a local psychiatric hospital tomorrow for an appointment. From there we will see what they would want him to do. Ironically this is a hospital I've been too. I am unsure if I will be going with him, probably not.

Again, I am pretty proud of him for taking these steps. We talked on the phone this evening and he mentioned how he felt he could talk to me because I've been there and I'm really the only person he knows who takes care of their mental health and cares about other peoples mental health.

And then me...I'm careful with how deep I get. I was able to go about my day today like I normally would. This is his journey. And I have my own mental health to worry about too. I can't support anyone if I don't take care of me.

 

[Recovery4Me]

And I have my own mental health to worry about too. I can't support anyone if I don't take care of me.

You are very wise and have been a solid friend for him. Warm thoughts for the both of you.:hug:

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

He is addicted to alcohol and tobacco and whenever I hear from him, they have him on a heavy dose of Valium. His withdrawal symptoms seem to be pretty strong. I am worried too about the Valium; he doesn't need to be addicted to something else but I understand why they have been giving it to him. His anxiety level and panic level was really strong, he told my yesterday he couldn't sit still. So the last time we talked he was pretty drugged up and losing focus on what I was telling him.

But I'm still proud of him. I know how scary this is.

I know the possible outcomes. I'm trying to hope for the best. I'm hoping this will actually help him and when he comes out he will have learned something. He is an intelligent guy. I think he can do this given the right help.

From my end, I bought some books that might help with supporting him. I never really saw myself in this postion before. Beside knowing I need to care for myself to be able to support him, all I really have to often is a little bit of knowledge about mental health and my blunt honesty, which always seems to work well with him.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

He called me a little while ago and we talked for 15 minutes.

He really wants to go home but the things he is saying too I really encouraging. He has a good shot at this. He is still talking about wanting to change his life and getting better. His doctor told him that he is doing a good job and that he has a really good chance. He just really needs support when he gets out. That's a major key right there.

We talked about the hospital too. He said he noticed that most people aren't there to change anything. But he is. I'm so shocked to hear this because I noticed too when I was in the hospital that few people were listening to the doctors and therapists. I was in a ward with 30 other people and maybe 1 or 2 others were listening and would actually try when they got out. He is listening and learning and still has strong convictions to change. I feel renewed hope.

He said he is getting out on Monday. We talked about the medication they gave him and his next steps. He is talking about support groups and AA.

 

[Recovery4Me]

Sounds very promising Ayesha! He has backbone like you! ((((hugs))))