When you don't know it's happening

[Punky143]

That refers to dissociating and feeling so far from myself. Sometimes I can hear snippets of voices, other times I I know words are coming out of my mouth but not from me. I fear the times I have no recollection. I'm working with my t to be more present, the reasons why, and coping methods. She has also met some of my parts in person. It's been helpful. She hasn't met all of them but clearly one part demands it. This is a scary part, one who has a messed up satisfaction over hurting others, she is the evil part. She doesn't talk, ask questions: she tells the parts to do. Perhaps this is why we're loosing time but we have a lot going on.
Any of this make sense? Rambling is a part.

 

[parrotthepolly]

It makes a lot of sense. Experienced it recently about 3 days ago when something that shouldn't have effected me made me end up doing some unexpected things to cope but right now I'm somewhat normal and I can tell it's not ever yet. A bit scared of the near future but if there are no mistakes made I won't learn.