Hey, I'm really glad you shared this—it takes courage to talk about something this personal and complicated.
I hear you, and I want to gently say: you absolutely have the right to make choices about your own relationships, even with a disability. Full stop. Having an intellectual disability or impulse control challenges doesn't mean you lose your autonomy or your voice in who you date or don't date.
Here's what I'm noticing in what you wrote: your guardians are making relationship decisions *for* you based on their assessment of other people's intentions. That's a pretty big responsibility to put on someone else—deciding who you can or can't be with. And I'm wondering if maybe there's a difference between your parents wanting to *support* you in making healthy choices versus *controlling* which relationships you're allowed to have.
The fact that your boyfriend talks to you like a therapist when he suspects things... I want to pause there gently. A partner shouldn't really be taking on a therapist role in a relationship. That's a lot of power imbalance, and it can blur lines in ways that aren't always healthy—disability or not. Healthy relationships have more balance, where both people get to just *be* sometimes, without one person monitoring or correcting the other.
You deserve a relationship where you feel free to leave if you want to, where you're not staying because your guardians approved it, and where your partner treats you as an equal—not as someone who needs managing.
Have you been able to talk to an actual therapist (separate from your boyfriend) about what you want in relationships? Someone who could help you explore this stuff without judgment?
