Why Is It Important That Those Around You Understand Your Ptsd?

[EvenStrongerNow]

I am going to pose an extremely difficult question and the reason why it's going to be difficult is because I'm going to ask that as you think about the answer to this question, you not filter your answer through your past experiences, anger, rage or defensiveness. You have to try an answer this with your heart.

Why is it important that those around you understand your PTSD/CPTSD?

I will start: Because it gives me permission to take care of myself.

 

[kyara]

Can I answer this question too?

As a supporter, an understanding and awareness allows us to learn to care for you and myself.

 

[atthree]

Simply, to be forgiven

 

[franciemarnie]

So my husband doesn't think I'm insane and worry. Once I explained it, there haven't been any real worries on his part. Compassion yes, but not real fears.

But it took a while for me to explain to him how it works.

 

[Deo Juvante]

I believe it is important for others around us to understand our conditions for acceptance. Not just for them to accept us, but for us to accept us. We are our own worst critics, capable of self destruction on a massive scale, but if those around us understand and accept us (flaws and all) then we can begin to accept ourselves vicariously.

Or.....it is important for those around us to understand our conditions for their safety. That sounds mean, but there are sufferers that can literally lose it.

 

[Barconian]

This is easy... Unconditional love!!!

 

[billie]

This is easy... Unconditional love!!!

Beautifully said.

 

[Echo]

Because, PTSD or not, I find miscommunication so wearing and pointless. I think it's just the human condition that it occurs, of course, but I think we generally seek out people in life who understand us and share our viewpoints, at least in good part. PTSD brings a whole new level of complexity to it. I suppose it is about validation, that you are not alone in the world. I have happily expended a lot of energy in really listening to people, to try to really understand what they mean (and am often complimented on being a good listener); so I guess it is a time when I really need that from other people.

 

[seedling]

This is a good question, something I need to think about. I'm not sure what my main reason is for myself.

Currently I'm trying to decide if I want to tell the few people I work with and I'm struggling with why I want to do that and why it may or may not be a good idea. I feel like it 's going to "come out" at some point, I'd like to be more sure about my motives.

Mostly I think that I have come to trust people more and I'm tired of hiding things. I seem to be searching for more and more closeness with the people that I've allowed in my life, their understanding of what's going on with me would help that.

 

[Pencil]

So that they will refrain from offering me 'solutions' to my life that actually make things worse (such criticizing me for not wanting to date / mate).

 

[HelenB]

Because after so many years of shutting and hiding away the real me, I now want to really be able to learn to be me, and know that healing is in being real. This means being real with others too and this is also a part of self acceptance, as I know I have shut so much away for so long, but when I can step back, I know that I too deserve to be allowed to be me and all the feelings which come with that, and as I allow myself to more, I know I have found more healing. Simply put it is about being real, which for me I know is such a massivly important thing, as it is OK to be me whatever I may feel like about it and I know that I have to continue to allow myself to be, even when it feels so hard.
Helen

 

[Nebulustrix]

My PTSD is minor compared to most - so much so I almost have a hard time saying I have PTSD until something comes up that really makes my symptoms spike. For the most part, I handle it just fine. The majority of my issues with it are "behind-the-scenes" type things that I handle on my own. So really, I haven't felt very much of a need for others to understand or even know that I have PTSD.

The only times I've really needed others to understand is when I'm dealing with the more overt symptoms- when something triggers me and I get panic attacks. This has come up three since I've come to this site- with a date, and at twice work when the HR office was going to have my son's picture posted in their newsletter for winning a coloring contest and my picture for a reward acknowledgement. In those instances I wanted, almost desperately, for those around me to understand.

I wanted that understanding because I was making abnormal requests of them (to stop texting me for the date, and to not post the pictures for HR). I needed them to understand the reasoning behind my requests.