Relationship Wife with ptsd having an affair

[LuckiLee]

So sorry this is happening to you!

But getting pregnant by another man while married is unforgivable IMO. Take care of you and your four children. They need you now more than ever! Let the other man keep her. You deserve better!

This isn't PTSD, this is a person with PTSD who has horrible coping strategies!

If I were you I'd get a lawyer and fight for sole custody. Good luck and I hope you find a solution to your situation!

✌ & ❤ to you and your children!

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I think you need to think about you for a minute.

I am a PTSD sufferer and I am WELL KNOWN as a "guy jumper". I will jump from one bed to the next to the next in a day. I will tell one guy the most hurtful vile things to get him to let me go so I can go f*ck another chump. It is the most unhealthy thing ever. Thus why my therapist had me jump out of the dating (**clears throat** - I mean f*cking) game. I've been with a few guys but for the most part all of that has stopped, for now.

All of that said, I have NEVER EVER EVER, and would never ever ever cheat on anyone. My ex had a hard time keeping up with me sexually and I was sexually frustrated for most of our relationship but he cheated, not me. I was 100% faithful to him minus porn and masturbation (some call that cheating, I don't). I was dating another looser my dad hooked me up with. He had 2 amazing little girls that he was verbally abusive to and that fuled many fights between us. He was a pothead pill popping junkie that hung out f*cking girls in sleezy hotel rooms. I was a mother figure to his kids that needed their dad. While their dad was getting high I was playing in the mud with his kids. It was awesome as I adore kids. I cannot have any so I adore chances like that and it pisses me off when people do not appreciate the fact that they have kids.

Anyway, was 100% faithful to him. I wanted to go f*ck around, I broke up with him. PTSD and "bed hoping syndrome" and all. This proves that one with PTSD is still responsible for their decisons and can make real choices. If she left you and shacked up with another man, she made her decision. I think it is time you stop waiting and thought about you. What do YOU need? Besides her. What do YOU need without her? What would it take to look after your needs? What would it take to walk away from her?

You need to look after you. You need to be first in your life with or without her and you need to learn boundry making. This would be a boundry heavily crossed in my book and the consequence for crossing this boundry in my world would be me walking away. Just my opinions.

 

[Htsmtg]

Hey, your story really moved me. I hope somehow that things with your wife can return back to a normal, faithful relationship... but I want to reiterate what others are saying...

Her cheating on you, threatening the family y'all have with four kids has *nothing* to do with PTSD. I will be a bit a blunt: she can either stop cheating, or you can get a divorce. Almost certain that you will both need couples therapy to get on the right track, and if she refuses to show up and participate, the marriage is already over.

I am sorry you are dealing with this betrayal. I have CPTSD and have met many people with PTSD, and once again, cheating is not a ptsd symptom. It's a symptom of selfishly or cowardly giving up on communication, faith, respect, and dignity of oneself, a partner, and the relationship. She may have her "reasons", and you might not be "perfect" either (no one is), but you both have to start facing reality and turn this ship back into a healthy relationship, or end it asap. Seek a therapist!!