Childhood Maybe

[Snowflake]

Maybe someone will read this and think of me.

Maybe someone will cares and believe me.

Maybe I should die.

Maybe if my mother dies, I won’t feel so guilty for talking -

Maybe she will apologize on her death bed.

Maybe she will finally say the right thing-

Maybe one day I will get a mother I always wanted.

Or a father.

Or a friend.

Maybe one day my mother will treat my kids how I wanted to be treated.

Maybe one day my mother will change. (My father is dead)

Maybe one day my mother or someone will tell me they love me and mean it – just once.

Maybe someone will finally see me as a good person.

Maybe one day I won't be so alone, scared, afraid to breathe and live.

Maybe one day I will feel loved and wanted.

Maybe one day I won’t have to feel the pain of rejection and abandonment from childhood.

Maybe everything will be better without that.

It shouldn’t have to be so hard.

I’ll just wait to get better, to be treated better.

It will happen, won’t it?

I’ll just wait. Or I will die.

 

[GrayOwl]

I see you as a good person.
I think if we keep looking for positives around us, and if we keep trying to learn how to find those positives and embrace them; somehow, someday, some of those good things will come out way.
I am sorry you are hurting. I can send a :hug: and hopes for some healing your way.