How Long Do You Isolate

[Vasubo]

I'm sorry that I even read this thread. It seems that perhaps a PTSD person isn't/shouldn't have access to these threads, but since I have read it and I get the initial question completely... I am going to start a thread that perhaps might shed some light. Please forgive me if I've overstepped. I do think the question is a very good one and for those of you supporting a person with PTSD, I think it's not only great but very insightful to recognize and acknowledge the need for clarification. Will make you a better support to a lot of people.

 

[Isifab]

It seems that perhaps a PTSD person isn't/shouldn't have access to these threads

Why is that? Sufferer insight can be very helpful for a supporter.

 

[Ulica]

Why is that? Sufferer insight can be very helpful for a supporter.

Because I am a "sufferer" and really didn't think that this is the place to add a comment. I'm in a pretty good place right now and have experienced both isolation and dissociation. Just don't want to tread on territory that isn't mine to tread. I hope you can understand that.

 

[Owu]

I hope you can understand that.

Its not my thread and you do whats best for you. I was replying to 'suffers shouldnt be allowed to have access to these threads' as though as speaking for all suffers. If its not for you then thats ok and dont access them.

 

[Fizoc]

If it's ok to add something, then I would agree that although isolation and dissociation do have some things in common, they're both very different.

I've isolated myself as a form of self-protection. I can be overwhelmed by a flashback/nightmare that seems too real, or have tried to reach out and been rejected and misunderstood - so I want to shut the drapes and stay by myself. I've been told by my husband, that when I do that, I don't only shut out the outside world ex phone, internet etc... but the people who are closest to me. My husband and children. My world is a small place anyways, but I can make it smaller. I honestly don't realize just how many weeks go by since this becomes my "norm" or safe zone. It's not logical or even sensible. But it is sometimes the only way I know to survive. I keep being encouraged to go out.. do something for myself, I just don't. I'm stuck in my own world and can't respond to anything else. I'm not sure it's a conscious thing, just on auto mode. Is it healthy? No. Something to be concerned about? Yes.

I've also experienced dissociation. It happened without my realizing it the first time. Dissociation is also a form of coping with a situation you find yourself in. It can last for quite a long time. Different for everyone. To dissociate is literally to disconnect from everything and everyone. Become third person tense. You respond, act, but not really as yourself. You've subconsciously separated yourself from the world around you. Some people (like myself) learned how to do that and so did, but there were some times when yes, there was lost time that I can't account for. No idea how the clock went by. For me, it lasted only 5 or 6 hours - I roused by the alarm I set on my cell phone to remind me to go and meet the school bus. I realized I had been sitting in my rocking chair most of the day with no recollection of anything. My T seems to show more concern when there has been time lost as opposed to taking on a third person tense.

I've learned how to dissociate myself when having to go to a place that has one or more triggers. I turn inward, and shut down any emotion that could cause anxiety or panic. Whatever it is that I'm facing gets buried down and kept there. That's a different form of dissociation. Not time lost, but simply a survival mode to cope with a given situation. "Choosing" perhaps to not use the coping tools I've learned, but rather disappear along with whatever it is that has triggered a response.

Does any of this make sense?

 

[Gonuko]

It seems that perhaps a PTSD person isn't/shouldn't have access to these threads,

This was a thread directly asking for sufferer input/explanation.

As a matter of fact, it was referencing something I -a sufferer- wrote, and was asking for clarification. I haven't actually responded to this thread, because plenty of others had it covered (Yes. Isolation. No, not disassociation.) :P Oh wait, I take that back, I did, too comment. Just not in response to the original Q, but a follow up Q.

As sufferers in the supporter section, we're guests in their "house". We're welcome here with that understanding. Also in point of fact, there's a thread pinned to the top of the supporter relationships forum reminding us about that.

Link Removed

 

[Pabob]

Really loved this thread until is started to break down...through no fault of the original poster. Good questions and insightful answers. :)

 

[Roduz]

Yes, it is off track and not sure why but let's redirect it.

I see now how dissociation may be more internal, as you are 'out of self', even around, or especially around others, while isolation is external, you're aware that you're physically making an effort to remove yourself from others, and both are an exercise in protection.
Paraphrasing what has already been said cuz I liked it.

 

[Culam]

After a very long time away from this thread, I see that my answer is still the same and I wanted to try to explain in different ways.

Im the "its June already" person; which was my attempt to put a "normal every day" explaination to somethung not normal every day.

These isolation threads get me as isolation depends so much on situation, set of circumstances, and the person themselves and their "issues" and where they are in "recovery", etc. Each reason of isolation will be different. Each "level" of isolation (do i call but dont see, do i text but dont call or see, do i not communicate at all, do i sometimes communicate and sometimes not etc) will be different. Each time frame for returning (if at all) will be different.

It honestly is impossible to say.

I isolate from my family because they're assholes. I self isolate because im terrified of people. I dont have a partner but if i did i would push him away to abandon him before he could abandon me; ive done that with others as well. I would likely push him away not wanting to hurt him.

None of which are conscience really. I can go months or in some cases years, and not realize i havent spoken to a person. Many in my family that arent assholes are those said people. Time honestly does slip away worse when you have a shit load of issues you are dealing with and doctors to keep up with and medication to take and a job to not loose etc. I may have isolated away from someone for one reason and that reason is over but i just got caught up in my world that i honestly just forgot.

Isolation and disassociation are two very different things. I disassociate for a few mins or an hour or maybe a day but for me thats rare. I have never heard of someone staying in a disaasociative state for months unless they have DID. Now, just because ive never heard of it doesnt make it impossibe. Anything is possible but the simpliest answer is generally the correct one. Ever heard of Occam's Razor?

Occam's razor is more commonly described as 'the simplest answer is most often correct...

https://explorable.com/occams-razor

So here you have many possibities but im laying out two; the just simply forgetting that im explaining and disassociation. Which one of the two is the simpliest answer? I find just simply forgetting and getting caught up in a shit load of issues the simplest but thats for you to decide i suppose.

 

[Vupajip]

Thank you, that helps me a lot as I am trying to understand the situation that I've found myself in recently. It doesn't help me figure out what to do, but at the very least it could explain things and helps me to keep calm and carry on while I make some decisions.

 

[Ozut]

Correct. It's a little bigger than losing track of time, at least, for me. I'll just not return messages, think I have...

This is exactly what I'm asking about. What you're saying is a year can go by and you don't even realize that much time had past. So if this person mentions it to you, does it "wake you up"? I mean, if that much time passes and they say something about it, do you suddenly realize how long it's been? And is it like this with all close people? Is it the same with family; close siblings, friends and or romantic partners (if you even have those)? I guess I'm asking if it's different depending on the level and type of relationship and does it make a difference if the person/people know you have PTSD?

 

[Nunar]

It's not dissociative,

it just seems like a good idea to avoid other people and events.
or to get my shit away from so...

I saw a lot of people like this. You said get your shit away from someone else's promising life. Is that it too? You think you're just going to bring someone down?

I know for me it can bring me down if someone I care for is depressed or worse suicidal, but it also brings me down when I don't know how they are. I don't expect anyone to be up and bubbly all the time. When I care for someone I want them to know they can be themselves with me. They can be moody, sad whatever. I am. I don't always want to act happy why should anyone else? I guess I'm just saying that as a supporter I'd rather my sufferer tell me how they feel and not worry about bringing me down. I'd like to have the chance to at least say "when you're ready I'm still here".