My grandma died two days ago and already much of the family has turned into vultures, converging to see how much of her stuff they can take. I am living in her house, with her permission, after taking care of her (as much as I could) for the few months prior to her death. I have also been able to use her car to take my baby to doctor's appointments and run errands. I never abused that privilege and used the car for anything else.
Well, now, my life is about to get a lot harder. My aunt -- the executor of the will -- is suddenly being very vicious towards me. She phoned me to tell me she is sending her daughter to live in the house with me to "help" me. I asked what kind of help she thinks I need, and she said she would help protect me against my other aunts and uncles. I am baffled by this, as I get along with my other aunts and uncles fine. But apparently this one aunt now wants them blocked from the house, for fear that they might steal some of my grandma's things. (She has no reason to think this).
I was warned from my grandma's part-time nurse that the cousin who is coming here is bossy, rude, obnoxious and has a habit for thinking my grandma's car is her own car. She has also said she intends to use my WiFi, which I pay for and is limited and I need for work. So I suspect she is going to be a big headache for me.
But perhaps more to the point. I was informed that nearly 10 relatives would be coming to town to stay in this house. There are 3 bedrooms, so I expect some people will be staying in the living room areas. These people are coming from out of the country so will be here for a few weeks.
So, I asked my aunt - the executor of the will -- if I could move to the upstairs bedroom so that my baby could be free from the noise and could have space to crawl. (The room we are currently in is the size of a closet and he has no room to move around or play, but I had been able to use the living room for him to crawl -- something I won't be able to do once all the relatives stay here.) I explained all of this to my aunt. But she told me I cannot move to that room because someone else might want it. I told her if that is the case I will have to stay at a motel for the time that relatives are here, because I cannot, in good conscience, force my kid to spend most of the day inside a tiny tiny room where he can't stretch his legs. She did not care.
Later I found out it's my cousin, who daughter, who is allowed to go into the big upstairs room. I know this sounds trivial, and in the grand scheme of things it probably is. But this aunt has now shown that she is trying to block her own siblings from coming to the house (which goes against my grandma's last wishes in the will), she seems to be trying to push me out, and she chose to take my grandma off life support without informing anyone else in the family until she was already done. My grandma's kids could have had a chance to say goodbye to her, but this one aunt decided not to inform anyone of what was going on.
I am very angry. I don't think I'm being greedy. I killed myself for the past few months trying to take care of my grandma. She was evil towards me at first but then I started buying her food and going out of my way (at the expense of my own health) to make her happy. I put in a great deal of effort to make her happy when her own children couldn't be bothered to even get her more care from a nurse, let alone come visit her.
And now my unemployed, responsibility-free cousin gets to come move into the biggest room and run the household, while I, the single mother juggling her newborn baby with a job gets to stay confined in a closet-sized room, without access to a bathroom, without any room for my baby to play ..... or I can just leave the house and give up, despite my grandma asking me to stay here at the end.
Ugh. I'm sorry this is so long. I'm just so angry right now.
Well, now, my life is about to get a lot harder. My aunt -- the executor of the will -- is suddenly being very vicious towards me. She phoned me to tell me she is sending her daughter to live in the house with me to "help" me. I asked what kind of help she thinks I need, and she said she would help protect me against my other aunts and uncles. I am baffled by this, as I get along with my other aunts and uncles fine. But apparently this one aunt now wants them blocked from the house, for fear that they might steal some of my grandma's things. (She has no reason to think this).
I was warned from my grandma's part-time nurse that the cousin who is coming here is bossy, rude, obnoxious and has a habit for thinking my grandma's car is her own car. She has also said she intends to use my WiFi, which I pay for and is limited and I need for work. So I suspect she is going to be a big headache for me.
But perhaps more to the point. I was informed that nearly 10 relatives would be coming to town to stay in this house. There are 3 bedrooms, so I expect some people will be staying in the living room areas. These people are coming from out of the country so will be here for a few weeks.
So, I asked my aunt - the executor of the will -- if I could move to the upstairs bedroom so that my baby could be free from the noise and could have space to crawl. (The room we are currently in is the size of a closet and he has no room to move around or play, but I had been able to use the living room for him to crawl -- something I won't be able to do once all the relatives stay here.) I explained all of this to my aunt. But she told me I cannot move to that room because someone else might want it. I told her if that is the case I will have to stay at a motel for the time that relatives are here, because I cannot, in good conscience, force my kid to spend most of the day inside a tiny tiny room where he can't stretch his legs. She did not care.
Later I found out it's my cousin, who daughter, who is allowed to go into the big upstairs room. I know this sounds trivial, and in the grand scheme of things it probably is. But this aunt has now shown that she is trying to block her own siblings from coming to the house (which goes against my grandma's last wishes in the will), she seems to be trying to push me out, and she chose to take my grandma off life support without informing anyone else in the family until she was already done. My grandma's kids could have had a chance to say goodbye to her, but this one aunt decided not to inform anyone of what was going on.
I am very angry. I don't think I'm being greedy. I killed myself for the past few months trying to take care of my grandma. She was evil towards me at first but then I started buying her food and going out of my way (at the expense of my own health) to make her happy. I put in a great deal of effort to make her happy when her own children couldn't be bothered to even get her more care from a nurse, let alone come visit her.
And now my unemployed, responsibility-free cousin gets to come move into the biggest room and run the household, while I, the single mother juggling her newborn baby with a job gets to stay confined in a closet-sized room, without access to a bathroom, without any room for my baby to play ..... or I can just leave the house and give up, despite my grandma asking me to stay here at the end.
Ugh. I'm sorry this is so long. I'm just so angry right now.
