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Deleted member 38644
I dont know what category to put this in but I hope I chose the right category this time. This website has been so supportive and it has helped me with so much since December. It felt so great knowing that you are not the only person that has the same ways or anything you are dealing with in common. When I first joined the website I thought I would not find anybody who has the same things happening to them like me, but I was wrong. I was raised in a very bad toxic environment that created nothing but a trauma cycle of everything for me. I didn't understand I was in a cycle until someone had to sit down with me. I grew up around schemes, murderers, abuse, trauma, gang neighborhoods, and drugs. we had our house kicked in for drugs when I was young. my cousin was shot 13 times because of drugs. I lost my best friend to domestic violence. I was also a victim of a domestic violence. I went through this entire cycle. I lived completely different lives to keep from being judged. I hid years of my life regarding me wanting to work for the FBI. I did different majors to keep from being judged. I lived in hidden worlds because I kept getting judged. My sister talked about me so bad to people and abused me mentally and emotionally. she would tell me how bad my life would be, but her life turned out to be everything she told me in a negative way. I felt trapped all these years and this website helped me alot. I have diaries and posts if anyone else interested in reading. Everything was repeating. I love this website! I get so much closure