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An objective exploration of the relationship between anxiety and core beliefs

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Slowstone

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Hey guys, I’ve been dealing with CPTSD and extreme Adult Separation anxiety my whole life. I’m a 28 year old male with Asperger’s.

After 10 years of battling through unnecessary pain and building the capacity to forge on, I’ve let up and dove deep into mindfulness.
I believe Mindfulness and Strength are each valuable tool sets to be used when appropriate. I found that focusing on one without the other didn’t serve me, and brought different symptoms to the surface.

When I was 3 years old, I was separated from my mother and was raised from 3-18 by a physically and emotionally abusive woman. At 22 years old, she drank herself to death.

This was all extremely difficult to understand and process, especially with Aspbergers. There’s a lot more to this story, but I won’t over-do it right now.

I want to share some of my discoveries and pondering on how I identify and process emotions. I experience fight or flight triggers daily, usually stemming from situations where I can’t detect connection with those around me. I’ve overcome a tremendous amount of separation anxiety and the brunt of triggers but still have intense surges of fear and anxiety on a daily basis.

This experience comes from the dedication and fortitude developed over a decade of holding my ground against an unending torrent of feelings. I am a practitioner of mindfulness diligently mapping out a grid of what’s happening inside. I recorded a video that I’d like to share, but if it’s not appropriate, I’ll type these thoughts out.

I would love it if you can add, challenge or support my understanding so I can better find the truth of what’s happening. Keep in mind that I see the world a little different than most due to Aspbergers. Most of my understanding and ability to connect with my emotions has been hard-won over many painful mistakes.
 
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I recorded a video that I’d like to share, but if it’s not appropriate, I’ll type these thoughts out.
Hi, and welcome.

I've removed your video content because of one of our rules, against self-promotion.

You're welcome to type out what you're thinking about/wanting to connect with other forum members on, so long as it doesn't get into promoting any kind of product or method that you've devised. You can read more about our forum rules and policies in our community constitution. If you have any further questions, you can ask them via contact us.
 
I think objectivity with this sort of thing is impossible. To expect objectivity is to fail before you even start. Everything is this realm is completely, entirely, 100% subjective.
 
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