"Motivating yourself" - how does this work/ not work with PTSD

[ILoveLife]

You could use my reason to quit smoking - instead of because not smoking is safer, I want to do it so I smell good.

Good smells are a world away from triggers and stepping into heaven of good things. Seriously.
You can buy scented paper and do your dreaded paperwork in that sense too.

Ok, not being helpful.

Maybe find what feels nice about doing something and focus on that?

 

[Kubash16]

I gotcha, I can understand that. I’m sorry for bringing it up, definitely didn’t want to do that.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

Well, for me, smells aren't a danger/ safety thing. Unless something smells dank/ damp/ moldy. And I would never, ever live in a place that smells like that, cos danger/ safety.

All other smells? Ain't a safety thing, so why would I "care"?

 

[Deleted member 47099]

I gotcha, I can understand that. I’m sorry for bringing it up, definitely didn’t want to do that.

No no no no :hug: :hug: :hug:
It's all good!
I wrote this stuff in this thread already.
It's not triggery or anything :)
Just the direction in which I'm trying to not-go.
:hug: :hug: :hug: :hug: :hug:

 

[ILoveLife]

I get it. Maybe focus on what feels good about doing the stuff you have no motivation for, that's what I mean.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

And thanks for both your ideas/ thought so far!! :)

I'm not being "difficult" on purpose btw :D

Just truly struggling to "get" any type of motivation that's not danger/ safety/ fear related.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

I get it. Maybe focus on what feels good about doing the stuff you have no motivation for, that's what I mean.

Yeah. From a PTSD point of view, all I feel is numb/ meh.

What feels good is "avoidance" of all non-danger tasks.

Cos then I can finally get a much-needed rest.

I dealt with all the safety/danger stuff... Now I get to rest and everything else (dishes etc) can f*ck off. :laugh:

(Again, not being difficult on purpose! :laugh: )

 

[ILoveLife]

I believe you, not on purpose :P

Dunno then, you need the Atlas of Emotions and some exploration into the world of emotional chores. Spoiler: It feels wonderful once they're done and over :D :roflmao:

 

[ILoveLife]

It's actually a thing: The Ekmans' Atlas of Emotion
I use it a lot

 

[Deleted member 47099]

Spoiler: It feels wonderful once they're done and over :D:roflmao:

Nope, doesn't work either :laugh:

I started a whole "relearning a sense of achievement" journal in the non-members diary section.

Cos once I've done the dishes? I feel zero sense of achievement or relief.

I just feel pissed off that I had to spend time doing them. And pissed off I'll be doing them again tomorrow too.

The only tasks I feel happy/ relieved about are danger/ safety tasks.

See why I'm asking "Am I nuts?" and "Is there any hope for me?"

Oh and I've struggled with this issue for 30 years now.

And touched on it time and again in 20 years of therapy.

With basically zero progress.

I didn't realise then tho, that my sole source of motivation is fear.

I'm hoping this new realisation will mayyyyyyyyybe lead to some vague kind of progress :facepalm:

 

[ILoveLife]

Hmmmmmmmmm... tough nut to crack.

do you currently have dishes to do?
I do. It's just putting in the machine, but I can't be bothered because talking here about the difficulty of doing dishes is pleasant.

So, if you do, is it motivating to think we're doing them together?
Or any other chore you need to do at the moment?

I always have chores to do, so you can ring me any time about it when you need to, if that's the case :D

 

[Deleted member 47099]

Hmmmmmmmmm... tough nut to crack.

do you currently have dishes to do?
I do. It's just putting in the machine, but I can't be bothered because talking here about the difficulty of doing dishes is pleasant.

So, if you do, is it motivating to think we're doing them together?
Or any other chore you need to do at the moment?

I always have chores to do, so you can ring me any time about it when you need to, if that's the case :D

Yeah, that does make it less sucky :hug: