Suffering from executive dysfunction, no treatment works

[What do I do]

I suffer from executive dysfunction but there is no treatment for it. I’m 55 I highly doubt cognitive behavioral therapy can help me at my age. I’ve been on permanent disability for major depressive disorder for about a decade now. I noticed I don’t have a learning disability since I was tested and the result showed that I have above average intelligence yet I couldn’t finish college even after 9 years of trying. I liked going but I just couldn’t get myself to do homework assignments or big projects like for my sociology class we had to write a 30 page paper on a topic of our choice and to help me out the professor, who was so kind, suggested I go door to door in my neighborhood and do a survey of some kind. As she was suggesting it I pictured myself in my mind attempting it and I thought to myself there is no way I’m doing that. Right after class I withdrew from that course and since it was required by my college for my major, I also decided to change majors. Thinking back to that time makes me wonder why I didn’t of suicide more often when I was in college because I changed my major like people change their underwear. I was lost so badly and you would think there would have been college counselors or something in the computer that would see a red flag or students who seem lost and offer some kind of help. Level the playing field. We put ramps in for those in wheelchairs could the school day that I can get take home tests or at least more time or someone who will assist me with assignments because I just avoided anything that I didn’t find appealing.

Going over it now it makes me feel like I want to die. Nobody gave a shit about me and my dad paid a lot of money to the school. On my tombstone I want it to have my name and then say this if it can be fitted on it: He lived a lifetime of underachievement before dying from a self inflicted gunshot wound to the head.

I figure that captures the essence of what a waste of time my life was. I think a lot about suicide and if only it was easy to do.

 

[Friday]

I suffer from executive dysfunction but there is no treatment for it. I’m 55 I highly doubt cognitive behavioral therapy can help me at my age.

Cognitive Therapy for neurological issues is completely different than Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for psych issues.

A cognitive therapist works in tandem with a neurologist, the same way a physical therapist works in tandem with surgeons, or a respiratory therapist works in tandem with a pulmonologist.

I’ve worked with cognitive therapists post concussion, post TBI, and post starvation. The other clients they have? Range from newborns with asynchronistic development to stroke victims in their 90s. 55 is prime for them, as they’re dealing not only with people with new issues wanting another decade or two to work, instead of taking medical retirement; but also people who’ve been struggling half their adulthood hitting their upper limits.

Give it a go. Really. I was HUGELY skeptical when I first went, because the exercises are bizarre, but also come to find? Bizarrely effective.

 

[Skywatcher]

I like what Friday said, give it a go! You have nothing to lose. If it doesn’t work it isn’t your lack of achievement…. We can put that on the medical stuff. ;-). Also, college isn’t for everyone. My T tells me to have compassion for the negative parts of myself. Hopefully, you can apply some to your own.