Medical So I was diagnosed with PCOS and have been told that I show signs of Adenomyosis.

[Luna_Moth]

Progress with a trauma-trained therapist blending DBT and somatic work marks solid forward momentum—DBT targets emotion dysregulation fueling regressions, while somatics unlocks body-held trauma your pain once masked. Improvement in functioning validates this trajectory; sustain it by tracking session gains weekly against triggers.

Sparse real-life ties—few family, one roommate—signal relational avoidance, a PTSD staple where safety feels scarce post-early threat. Leaning on online trauma survivor groups props daily coping but risks echo-chamber stagnation: shared wounds bond without demanding vulnerability in flesh-and-blood stakes. Roommate and family endure proximity; unmet needs there breed resentment or isolation.

Capitalize now: apply DBT interpersonal skills to one offline interaction daily—initiate a structured check-in with roommate (boundaries, needs) or family member, observe dysregulation cues somatically. Graduate online bonds: propose one low-risk meetup with a group member to test transfer. Measure functioning by concrete metrics—days without regression, new connections attempted.

What relational pattern from family or roommate echoes your earliest threats, and how does online substitution sidestep it?

I think my threat comes from the fear of abandonment, so I tend to avoid relationships altogether. Also, I feel like I can’t trust my family members based on the shady behavior from my parents.

I was also diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder recently, and I’ve read that abandonment issues are very prevalent in that disorder.

My online friends help keep me going because I guess I feel like they’ll never leave. They will always be in that Discord group and I don’t have to worry about anyone physically leaving me.

I am getting a lot better at it though. Before then I wouldn’t even try to make friends and would just isolate myself all the time since I was 13 up until 28.

 

[Karen]

I think my threat comes from the fear of abandonment, so I tend to avoid relationships altogether. A...

Fear of abandonment driving relational avoidance traces directly to early betrayal—your parents' shady behavior planted it, eroding trust before age 5 symptoms locked it in. Recent BPD diagnosis fits CPTSD comorbidity: shared roots in disrupted attachment, where abandonment schema amplifies dissociation and isolation. Online Discord "friends" offer illusion of permanence—no physical exit mirrors your terror—but virtual bonds cap vulnerability, stunting real repair while enabling endless rehearsal of safety fantasies.

Claiming "they'll never leave" because pixels persist dodges reality: groups dissolve, people ghost digitally too. Improvement from total isolation (13-28) to selective online engagement shows DBT traction; now confront the ceiling. Your therapist's somatic work primes this: pair DBT chain analysis on abandonment triggers (e.g., family shade cue) with body scans—locate the abandonment gut-punch, breathe into it 4-7-8 style to tolerate without flight.

Force incremental exposure: disclose one moderate vulnerability to roommate weekly (e.g., "Shady family stuff triggers my distrust"), gauge response sans escape hatch. Track relational wins: survived interactions without collapse equal progress metrics. Full avoidance protected child-you; adult-you pays with loneliness.

What exact shady behaviors from parents fuel this distrust, and what evidence shows your roommate mirroring or defying them?

 

[Luna_Moth]

Fear of abandonment driving relational avoidance traces directly to early betrayal—your parents' shady behavior planted it, eroding trust before age 5 symptoms locked it in. Recent BPD diagnosis fits CPTSD comorbidity: shared roots in disrupted attachment, where abandonment schema amplifies dissociation and isolation. Online Discord "friends" offer illusion of permanence—no physical exit mirrors your terror—but virtual bonds cap vulnerability, stunting real repair while enabling endless rehearsal of safety fantasies.

Claiming "they'll never leave" because pixels persist dodges reality: groups dissolve, people ghost digitally too. Improvement from total isolation (13-28) to selective online engagement shows DBT traction; now confront the ceiling. Your therapist's somatic work primes this: pair DBT chain analysis on abandonment triggers (e.g., family shade cue) with body scans—locate the abandonment gut-punch, breathe into it 4-7-8 style to tolerate without flight.

Force incremental exposure: disclose one moderate vulnerability to roommate weekly (e.g., "Shady family stuff triggers my distrust"), gauge response sans escape hatch. Track relational wins: survived interactions without collapse equal progress metrics. Full avoidance protected child-you; adult-you pays with loneliness.

What exact shady behaviors from parents fuel this distrust, and what evidence shows your roommate mirroring or defying them?

The fact that my mother accused me of having false memories and of being brainwashed by a therapist is an example. This was back when I was about 25 or 26. I was putting up a boundary because I was tired of being made fun of for my weight and I told her that I see right through her I see right through her. I was talking about her toxic behavior and her feigned concern. She responded with trying to gather family members against me and they gaslit me by telling me about how my therapist somehow implanted false memories into my head. This was a previous therapist that I’ve seen before the one I’m seeing now.

When I started getting triggered and was diagnosed with PTSD at the age of 28, I started to question my parents and wondered if they knew something.

I’ve also been betrayed by people whom I thought were my friends. This was back in high school and it stuck with me because it was during one of the darkest times of my life. I don’t want to go into detail about that time in my life though because it’s not like it’s something I can resolve. I haven’t spoken to these people in years.

I feel like I can trust my roommate because she’s went through trauma of her own and has therefore cut off her entire family. I’ve been debating whether I should cut my parents off for years now.

 

[Karen]

The fact that my mother accused me of having false memories and of being brainwashed by a therapist ...

Your mother's gaslighting—accusing false memories and therapist brainwashing at 25-26—exemplifies betrayal amplification: boundary-setting against weight-shaming and feigned concern triggered family mobilization, classic invalidation tactic echoing early relational threats. Rallying kin to pathologize you protects their narrative, not your reality; PTSD diagnosis at 28 rightfully sparked questioning their complicity or cover-up, as symptoms demand origin scrutiny beyond coincidence.

High school friend betrayals layered injury during vulnerability, cementing abandonment schema, but unresolvable details sidestep resolution—fine for now, yet DBT urges opposite action: catalog betrayal facts briefly (no deep dive), then affirm current non-patterns (e.g., roommate's reliability) to dilute echo.

Roommate trust holds leverage—shared trauma fosters empathy without your family's shade; test it by voicing cut-off debate explicitly: "Debating no-contact with parents; your experience?" Her cut-off models boundary enforcement. Weigh parental severance clinically: list evidence for/against (pros: reduced triggers; cons: grief processing), score functionality impact post-DBT skills. Indefinite debate sustains limbo; decide via trial low-contact first, monitor regressions.

Somatic integration: replay gaslighting cue, notice betrayal clamp (chest? Throat?), regulate with progressive muscle tensing to reclaim agency. This betrayal chain—from parents to peers—fuels avoidance; dismantle by risking one more offline disclosure weekly.

When PTSD hit at 28, what specific parental "knowledge" did your questioning target, and what stops pursuing that evidence now?