Ms. Spock,
Your apology is accepted.
Thank you. I am humbled by your generosity.
I truly understand that a female victim of sex abuse is terrified of a male sexual predator. My point was to bring to light that sexual abuse happens to both male and females, and they are both victims. I also wanted people to understand that when children act out, many times there is an underlying reason for their acting out, and a lot of times it is due to them being victimized.
Oh I do know that both males and females are sexually abused intothelight. I spent the same amount of time protecting my sisters and my brothers from my sexual predator father.
It is true intothelight children do act out when they are being abused and traumatised.
Yes, it is critical the cycle be broken. If there is one thing I do in this life, it is to do my best to see the cycle is broken and that my children are healed, so the next generation doesn't suffer the hell these two generations have (myself and my children).
And you and your children have been to hell and back any number of times. I admire you.
Honesty like yours and your children will break the cycle. You have done very well.
Never be afraid to post what is in your heart and/or mind. This is how we all learn and deepen our understanding of complex and painful experiences. Actually, you were very brave to post what you did and I felt that it was valid and needed to be addressed from another perspective.
Once again I am humbled by your modelling of best practice in terms of differing points of view, modelling compassion towards me, who got it so wrong and your generosity of spirit. You are inspiring.
Please don't feel guilty, as I think that as this is read, it will open a lot of people's minds and maybe help them to view abuse from a broader perspective.
Deb
Thank you your kindness is so appreciated. I felt so much better to see that you had read my apologies and had clicked "like" I must admit.
I kind of see that as a big part of my life, to get people to view abuse from a broader perspective. This has been a tremendous learning experience for me. I have always tried to make people aware that it is not just men who abuse but women as well. I used to talk a lot more about males being sexually abused and how their stats were lower than girls primarily due to under reporting and the stigma of being a male, vulnerable and not wanting to be seen as a victim.
I somehow got lost along the way. My insensitivity is inappropriate. I was trying to think why I responded that way - and I think I was acting out. (which is, of course no excuse) There are a number of reason that I was acting out, because there is a woman leaving her child with the parent that sexually abused her as a parent, that I never had a mother like you, and a lot about all my ptsd stuff which is all over the place at the moment and despite all my efforts in my life time, the cycle of abuse has not been broken in my family nor will it be. I spoke about what I had written with my psychiatrist yesterday and she told me of a poor young man who at thirteen did something to one who was 10 and a decade later could still not forgive himself, despite what had been happening to him at that time.
I don't know if that is what is really going on for me, to be honest, because I am a bit disassociated at the moment - but that is my best guess.
I do appreciate the kindness, compassion and generosity of spirit with which you responded to my posts.
I felt so bad, that I was prepared to be banned and cast out because I stuffed up big time. Yet all I have experienced is kindness, compassion and generosity of spirit.
I shed a few tears as I type this and thank you once again.
ms spock
