If I Could Spray Paint A Message Across The Forum...

[Nicolette]

I just read this and if I could spray paint it across the forum I would as it makes so much sense....

Depression and trauma are disconnective disorders. They do not improve in isolation. To fix them you have to be connected to others.

Thank you The Albatross :hug:

 

[Philippa]

It's such a difficult thing though, but it is true.

Depression makes you want to remove yourself from people who usually won't be able to say anything helpful, and in fact can make you feel worse, and yet, you need them to be able to get better? Same for trauma.

 

[DharmaGirl]

Yep, sometimes I feel like people make me feel worse, so I stay in. It is very hard to just do what needs to be done. If it were easy, we wouldn't need a forum.

 

[anthony]

I've been waiting for something new to catch my eye that was a significant statement to change this forums header with, and you just gave me that Albatross. Thank you very much.

 

[Nicolette]

Looks like I got my wish :p

 

[Loloma]

Alba, never heard anything more true. Isolation is the worst way of dealing with depression. I can only speak from my own experiences, and that of the suicide and deaths in my family. And by saying that, it's self explanatory.

Reaching out to the forum for help with my last trauma, helped me put it all in perspective. Had some hard truths put to me, where I had to take a good look at myself. It's not easy but sometimes we need to stop blaming and start changing and rebuilding. We cannot change the past. The longer we dwell on the trauma and hang on to it, the harder to become to move on with living in the present.

In saying this everyone is different and the process of healing can vary. However we must reach a point where we stop being the victim, living in self pity because at times it's "comfortable". Sometimes without us knowing it and start doing the hard work. The mileage we get from the 'woe is me attitude' runs out at some point. It becomes self defeating, stopping others from wanting to help us.

In stating the above, I am not talking about those suffering from chronic life threatening illnesses. That is different as so many on this forum are facing this at the moment. Somehow they manage to still find positivity and reach out to help others. I truly admire them for this.

 

[Sammy]

Personally it is a matter of finding the right balance. I need enough "me time" to not get too overwhelmed but enough interaction to not become depressed. Sometimes I am good at the balance, sometimes I am not. :O_o: I am getting better at being aware but it is a process. :facepalm:

 

[AngelaMarie]

I've learned this!

 

[CraftyCath]

I know this in my head but have a terrible time putting it into practice.

I tend to isolate myself, make excuses,

I need to meet people but I'm not sure how?

 

[AngelaMarie]

((((Cath))))) That's a problem I have.....how do you talk and start a friendship with someone?!:confused:

 

[Nicolette]

Cath maybe just go to a quiet coffee shop and take a book, get comfortable and then over time (visits) close the book and start by saying hello to the staff who would now be familiar with you?

 

[CraftyCath]

((((((Angela)))))))

I have no idea Angela. Apart from those I have met on the forum I only have a couple of friends locally and I'm lucky if I see them twice a year. I do try but they are always so 'busy.' Perhaps I need to join something to get me out more.