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Trust Too Easily

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I have a couple that I am making friends with. They are very caring and generous people. They have offered to take me to church with them. They are really down to earth. They bought our jeep off of us and they are enjoying it very much.

I am so glad to hear this. You are making so much progress. I have been observing it.

It takes time to get to know people. I need to go slow. I am far too trusting. I need to pay attention to the gut feelings I have about the people I have contact with. It takes time.I hope this helps.

I like this affirmations.

Your posts always been helpful to me. :)

Thank you hug. :hug:
 
I agree. :)

For me I thought I should trust them without question. I liked to believe everyone can be trusted and are good human beings. And you are correct they took advantage as I did not give myself time to get to know them enough to trust them. I had to accept that not all people can be, even though they might appear to be. The selfish gene is developing I like to think. ;)

best wishes
Saffy :)
 
A girl from foster care ended up being my best friend for nine years. She was always looking for a free ride and I was too nice to offer more than she was willing to give back. She took advantage of my generosity for years. A few years ago she started drinking every day and that was the last straw in our friendship. I felt like I outgrew and surpassed her in life and I haven't talked to her in about three years.

Back then in foster care I was moved around so much that it was rare to have anyone consistent so I couldn't be picky with my friends. I took what I could get. I am much more selective with my friendships and stick to people who are giving like me. We feed off of each others energy in good ways.
 
I need to listen to my gut instincts. I am weary of trusting too easily. I need to go with my gut. It never lies to me. But I can be fooled so easily. I hate that about me. My truster is broken. I am good natured and easy going. That is why it is such a shock to realize I am being rejected over a difference of opinion.

A healthy person does not blow up with repressed rage at someone over a difference of opinion. I will heal. It will take time.

I just want to get along with everyone. And that is not realistic or healthy. I need stronger and more firm boundries.

I really need to learn how to not take things so personally. I think I will make a post about that.

Thanks Jaret for this thread. Hugs to you.
 
I think it depends on the person or situation for me. Usually I can pick out people that shouldn't be trusted in work situations, not always though. Same with some strangers. However, if you become my friend I will trust you unconditionally. If you break that trust, you won't get it back. We might be friends, but I will never look at you the same.

My ex husband was a chronic liar. I really wanted to trust him. Unfortunately, both his dad(who I adored) and my ex lied to his mom to make things easier for themselves. When he did it to me, I realized if we had children they would probably do the same because lying is easier for some people(not me). Our therapist told him his mom may have accepted it but I would not. He didn't listen and was surprised when I left him. Saying I didn't give him a "chance" or work on it. What were all the therapy sessions for?

I am naive, and gullible, far too trusting. I am vulnerable

I tend to be this way when I trust someone. They can pretty much trick me on things. Like, once, when I was in my twenties, the weather was horrible and a friend told me a hurricane was coming. Though I thought that was strange for Wisconsin, I believed him. I'm not a stupid person, just incredibly gullible and trusting of friends. I also want to believe in the good of people, which is naive at times. I have been hurt by that more then once.

You are definitely not alone!
 
Britt thank you for sharing what you did. Once my trust is betrayed I disconnect from the person. Do it to me once shame on you, do it to me twice, shame on me. I am incredibly gullible and trusting of friends too. I keep forgetting that it takes along time to make a friend and that there is no such thing as instant friendships.
I also want to believe in the good of people.

But when they dump on me out of the blue I am done with them. I treat them like I would treat an online troll, I ignore them.

I am lucky that I have had my share of hurtful relationships in the past. For a year and a half I have been at peace with only a couple of incidents. But they were handled. I have been hurt more than alot of times.
 
A healthy person does not blow up with repressed rage at someone over a difference of opinion. I will heal. It will take time.

Wow, that's a sign of being around healthy people.

I really need to learn how to not take things so personally. I think I will make a post about that.

Count me in. I do take things very personally.

We will heal. :hug:
 
Same with some strangers. However, if you become my friend I will trust you unconditionally. If you break that trust, you won't get it back.

I have replaced this now. I won't trust them easily. I have decided to develop trust as they go with me. We should not be so quick to trust them so easily. What if they came out wrong and we have just made friendship.

But if your gut feelings say to trust them quickly for some reason, that's different thing. I am thinking gizmo is trying to work on this. Going with your own gut feelings can raise your confidence & trust on yourselves. :)

I don't like chronic liars either. They lie every time. My bio mother is like this. She will lie every time. I think lying is her profession. It's very hard to deal with such people. Best way would be to stay out of their life.

When he did it to me, I realized if we had children they would probably do the same because lying is easier for some people(not me).

I agree on this.

Britt, you seem to put genuine care and trust in friendship. It's nice to know you. :)
 
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