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Sufferer Seeking Support

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Kylee

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Hi Everyone, I'm Kylee. I just need to vent part of my story. I'm looking for support. I told 5 times. The first was when I was 9 years old. My school did nothing. My abuser threatened me w gun and knife. The second time I told there was a group of us. He got misdemeanor battery. I got pushed to the ground and beaten. Like a dog my face rubbed against the ground. "Now go tell that to your mommy", he said, "and see what happens." The third, he almost drowned me. I didn't say enough that time for the officer to do anything. The officer did call the school and got his name though. I said no when the cop asked me if he should go have a talk with him for me. My abuser must've found out that I told from the school. The fourth time I said more than enough, "theres a girl in his room..".."check the trunk." The trunk had child porn. He needed our help to put it there before the police arrived. The cop drove me home and asked me something ridiculous. (this frekin system works for the abuser) Next I maced that man and ran away as a 12 year old seeking revenge. He didn't want me anymore and I was mad. The girl he had tied up that last time was so much younger than I. I wanted to help her and myself, that's why I called the cops. My original plan for that day was to take his picture and post flyers in the area alerting the community of him. I sat in the cop car on my way home thinking about that girl. There was nothing I could do to help her. I knew I had to let it go. That's when I went back and maced him.

THE 5TH time I told I wound up arrested with a 3rd degree felony. All I was truly doing January of 2013 was looking for information. I also thought maybe I could get some money for damages since the abuse started at school. I spoke to a few attorneys and found nothing. I couldn't even remember his name. The last attorney I spoke with told me to let it go. I did not want to move on and make the next 25 years better than the first like he suggested. I was serious about getting information. I called police records and the clerk of courts trying to find out what happened to my child abuser. A three year time frame and name of school was not enough to get information from the police or clerk. That's when I sought a prior therapist to help me process the experience. In the beginning of this experience I barely remembered anything. HYPNOSIS changed me. This therapist and some others did major hypnotic work on me. I thought they were helping me. I did everything they said for me to do. Little did I know they were luring me to jail. When questioned I had no idea what was going on. Call it psychosis, but I'll always know it was hypnosis. That's all I believe I can say for now. I still have to wait for a verdict and possible sentencing. I know there's nothing I can do legally about what happened. I was beaten so bad last year I'd like to avoid another assault by trying to pursue anything else. This is strictly for support.

Has anyone had trauma memories pulled out painfully quick with the use of hypnosis? I need a friend<3
 
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Yes, it's me. I think the court system is different in the UK? Third degree felony means I've been charged with a crime. A crime I committed under hypnosis without knowing what I was doing. I was also driven to complete tasks out of hypnosis to set myself up. I was being manipulated to like the people helping keep my story hidden and left in the trance. I was nieve. The police did reopen and reinvestigate my child abuse case, but nothing came of it of course. I don't know what happened and I can't ask. My childhood abuse was incredibly extreme I don't think they believed me. It was such an old case anyway. I didn't think anything would come of it. I just wanted to know the truth about what happened. A victims advocate at the station told me one thing, the detective told me another.
 
Oh My that is dreadful! I do hope that you get the outcome that you are hoping for.
I was abused as a child. Then randomly I was offered hypnosis to help me stop smoking - but I refused as I was scared of hypnosis making me say or do thing without being in control. I guess you got caught in this and it is awful.

When do you get to hear what is instore for you?

As for the abuse, is there any form of help for you for that? I can understand you being very nervous but I don't know of any therapist these days that uses hypnosis. Personally I had EMDR which does not put you into a trance and you stay in full control. I am sure you do need help in some form as what happened to you was so wrong. I know in the US there is the complication of needing insurance and stuff like that. Are you able to get help to deal with your past? You deserve it. Your childhood was not your fault!
 
Thank you Lucycat for the support! I don't blame you for refusing. It sucks being further victimized from my child abuse as an adult. I didn't think I'd be hurt again for saying something. As soon as I started speaking to attorneys about my child abuse the hypnosis use and abuse began - I didn't know it until later. I know myself. I'm not some psychotic mental patient. That's how I kicked it. I was fully aware during many of the hypnosis play outs that it was hypnosis which was driving me. I could not control it. I knew I had to keep myself safe. I'll find out what's in store for me in December. Right now I'm on an ankle monitor. I can't leave the house unless its to go to court or for medical reasons. A lot of therapists use hypnosis in the US, a lot. I heard about EDMR. I don't know anything about it. Have you tried it? Does it help? As far as therapy there are programs in some places which offer basically free treatment. I only pay three dollars a visit because I am indigent and relying on family to help me right now. I'm lucky to have that support.

intothelight, hypnosis was used for far more than to recover lost memories. I don't know what that last part was about.
 
Welcome, Kylee. It sounds like you may have been a victim of ritual abuse. Was it a group who collaborated against you when you were a child?

I don't know if it was ritual abuse, but it was really bad to say the least. I tried calling my abuser yesterday. I kind of miss him. I know I need treatment for it. It's hard for me to open up in therapy about the abuse. I feel sick for feeling like this. Last year I called and he didn't answer. I was terrified after doing it. So terrified I slept with a boakken sward for a little while. Yesterday I tried calling him and the number was disconnected. I think he's dead. I feel sad. I really wanted to talk to him. Anyway, umm, not a group, but he did sell me to three people. I had to get other kids involved, it sucked. I grew to love him.

Like I said in my first post I was abused by my prior therapist and a few others last year. What I had to do for the therapist and few others led me to the hospital and ultimately to jail. I didn't have a choice in the matter as my life was threatened. In the beginning I thought they were helping me. Little did I know what was truly happening under hypnosis. I was in complete shock when arrested. Then again on three separate occasions this past month about people have come into my home. I did not welcome these people in. It's so sad I cannot do anything about it. I want it to stop, but I don't know what to do. I don't know why they let me remember some of the hypnosis. Aren't you not supposed to remember anything from under hypnosis unless told that you'll remember? The last time someone came here the therapist was on the phone. I really only remember asking her to think about what she was doing. I fear what's in my subconscious to do and what I could have possibly done again under hypnosis with these people. How do I get it to stop? Telling did not work for me last time. I got beat up for trying. What do I do?
 
Welcome.

I don't know...but... Maybe hypnosis can be broken/removed by further hypnosis. Obviously would need to be with someone trustworthy and I would have a friend go with you so they can be conscious for you.
 
My heart really goes out to you kyle. I wish I could help you. I haven't been to any therapies I am only seeing a Dr every 2 months for a talking and understanding my illness type thing. I suggest the same thing go with a trusted friend, or two. Its not unlikely all of you will be hypnosised. Perhaps go to a hospital and ask the Dr there which thearpist hypnosis they trust, and go from there?
 
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