Where Was Cpa?

[MCBL71]

I never had any association with CPS, but the police did finally take us away from Dad. At the time the two homes across the road were owned by police officers. The two 'men' would sit on their front porches drinking beer and watching Dad abuse Mama and us kids, as if they were watching some sort of action movie.

Finally my brother reported Dad and two other officers came out to our home. The younger officer was nice, but the older one slapped Dad on the back saying, "I know how it is man, I have to smack my wife and kids around sometimes to keep them in line as well." Dad had an unregistered handgun, which he'd been threatening us with for years. The officer told Dad he could keep it for 'protection', this meant the report was going to make my brother look like a liar.

During the court trial Mama got custody, but Dad was granted unsupervised visitation, despite having threatened to kill us kids on numerous occasions. Thankfully Dad never showed up for any of his visitation days since it interfered with his drinking schedule, but Mama went right back to him a few months after their divorce was finalized.

 

[Nyssa]

I can relate. I'm so sorry for all of you, and all the other kids who never got help.

Child protective services came to our house once. I was around 5. At school, my brother had said we were physically abused by our father.

The two social workers who came stayed at the door, in the front yard. They only met our abusive father. And nothing else happened.

Despite the intense yelling and shaming that followed, my brother kept on telling people we were abused. He was never taken seriously.

I got the message : Shut up. It's wrong. It makes dad angry and mum sad.

 

[Nyssa]

Falling through the cracks, part 2.

10 years later, my brother has turned into a pedophile. He has molested a 3 year old cousin. The cousin's parents confront him but they choose not to press charges.

The whole family sees him as a pedophile. But no one seems to care.

At 18 years old, my brother is a big fan of some star children. The Olsen twins. They are still kids at the time. He collects photographs of them, tapes and video cassettes. He doesn't hide the least bit his obsession. His high school note books are full of pictures of them. He talks about them all the time. To his friends, his teachers, our mother. Everyone. It's creepy but people accept it. Once, our biology teachers mentions it to me. I go "he's a pedophile". She looks embarassed and says nothing.

Two years after that, he is caught downloading child pornography on the internet. A short investigation takes place. But nothing happens. The cops question him and search his place. He says he was just curious. And that's it.

Fast foward another 10 years. I finally press charges against him for the years of sexual abuse he put me through. I tell the police he is most probably an active pedophile. But for the next two years nothing happens.

He is eventually prosecuted for rape and he is let free. The police discovers he is in the process of adopting a child, as a single father. And again, nothing happens.

The cops and the investigation judge do go to the trouble to question him on his desire to adopt. Apparently, they find it relevant to the picture of the suspected pedophile. But they don't care to inform the social workers who are investigating him for the adoption agreement.

I get the "innocent until proven guilty" principle. I agree with it. And I understand how it can prevent my brother from being put in custody. But considering he might be dangerous, things could go faster. They should. We have been at it for 5 years at that point.

Fortunately, my brother never got to adopt. Unfortunately, that's only because he was thrown in jail after having raped other children. His latest victims were adopted children he had met in the community of adoptive parents he had become a part of.

Only at that point did the system took the situation seriously. Further investigations revealed other victims.

I still have a hard time wrapping my head around this accumulation of f*ck-ups. Poor judgement, lack of care. So much indifference...

 

[Nyssa]

@Dana1010 ,

I can't believe it didn't occur to me to try to get emancipated

It's tempting to look back and tell yourself you should have known better. I don't think it's fair.

Children are not equiped to save themselves from dangerous parents. The surrounding indifference doesn't change that.

 

[Dana1010]

But they don't care to inform the social workers who are investigating him for the adoption agreement.

Wow, what a story. How old was he when he started molesting you? Was he molested by your parents before he became a molester himself?

 

[Nyssa]

I don't know why I wrote this whole part 2 in the present tense, it's confusing.

My brother started doing weird sexual things with me when he was around 7, I'd say. I'm not sure. But until he was around 12, I wouldn't call that abuse.

We were both molested by our father from early on. Raped, actually.

He didn't talk about that part when he said we were abused. Not that I know of, anyway.