Is There Just Always A Snake In The Grass??

[iwannadeletethis]

So I feel like I can't find a job without detecting a snake in the grass. Some crooked som bitch that decides you're a threat at some point and tries to manipulate the boss who's also crooked. Are business owners always like this? Is it like chess? Should I always be strategic in finding the threat?

 

[WillyKat]

The business world runs on fear and fear brings out the snake in people. Every new hire is a potential friend or foe. At least in some companies anyway.

I don't know if this qualifies as advice or not, but in my current job, I do what I'm supposed to do and try not to vent about anything, or take sides. I figure if they detect I don't give a rip they won't see me as a threat.

 

[The Albatross]

Way too general for me... I've had some really shit jobs, and bosses.... but just curious how you think you'd be able to "be strategic and find the threat"? Lord knows I never could.

 

[The Albatross]

So I feel like I can't find a job without detecting a snake in the grass.

Hmm came back and re-read. How exactly is it that one can acquire this skill? If you "detect" a snake in the grass... why do you take the job?

 

[iwannadeletethis]

@The Albatross ive just gone through too many jobs in the past few years. You start to notice this type of fear in people's faces. My last job, they kept a secret gossip blog about all of the workers plus paid us with counter fit money now and again. So I picked the most calm unpopular coffee shop atmosphere I could. And there's one guy. With that fear on his face. My boss found out that I'm just sweet, not a push over. We'll see how long this lasts. The only way I keep a job anymore is if there's men in management who think it's a game to try and get in my pants. I don't know what I'm gonna do when I've lost my youth.

 

[The Albatross]

I developed an "ice queen" personality for that stuff... I had an Ice Queen boss to model myself after... she made work places more bearable... and I worked on boundary setting for the getting in your pants thing. To me it was clear, abundantly I was flat out insulted and not interested ever. They tried but I didn't cave.

 

[iwannadeletethis]

Hmm came back and re-read. How exactly is it that one can acquire this skill? If you "detect" a s...

It's just learning to read people @The Albatross. It's experience and learning from it. I took the job because people are people and it seemed all right. Didn't meet my coworkers until I started. But I'm getting to the point where I'm not sure if there's any kind hearted business owners out there.

 

[The Albatross]

P.S. Unfortunately for me, I didn't tend to see the fear in people's faces til after I was hired.

Can you reframe it as a goal challenge? To use as a way to break the cycle/pattern?

 

[iwannadeletethis]

I developed an "ice queen" personality for that stuff... I had an Ice Queen boss to model myself af...

I don't cave either. People mistake my kindness for flirting all the time. I just come from a different culture. And I think that's my temporary job security right there. If I were to ice queen that shit I'd be gone so much faster.

 

[The Albatross]

It's just learning to read people @albitross. It's experience and learning from it. I took the job beca...

Jaded by all the bad experiences I get it... but, BIG BUT... there is a workplace for you and you'd do better to scan for opportunities than scan for threats.

 

[The Albatross]

" If I were to ice queen that shit I'd be gone so much faster." And that would be a bad thing how?

 

[iwannadeletethis]

P.S. Unfortunately for me, I didn't tend to see the fear in people's faces til after I was hired....

You get a good look at your coworkers until you start working with them. Business owners are very good at putting on faces. If they didn't, they wouldn't have a business. So I feel like it's impossible. And I feel like the more I figure this shit out, the more likely I am to go off the grid.