Not Sure Where To Post. I Am Restricting My Fluids Because I'm Terrified Of Going To The Toilet Help

[super_saiyan]

I am currently severely restricting my fluids because I am too scared of having to go to the toilet. I only go once a day, in the morning and I literally spend all night psyching myself to go to the toilet. I get very dissociated whenever I see the scar near my vagina that he made and I simply cannot stand touching myself (wiping) in that area. So I am drinking a very small amount a day (400ml). I need to increase my fluids and it's got nothing to do with the fluids, it's just the toilet issue and everything that comes with it.

Does anybody have any advice? Or any practical help? Anything would be so appreciated.

I just need a way to increase my fluids whilst being able to manage what happens when I do.

Thank you so much.

 

[Kailani]

Saiyan, I think you need to talk to a therapist about this asap; you have to drink fliuds or u will get dehydrated and have no energy, can't think straight, get sick.... I am sorry you are having such a hard time with that. I am sorry that happened to you

 

[super_saiyan]

Saiyan, I think you need to talk to a therapist about this asap; you have to drink fliuds or u will get...

I am currently in therapy, I just cannot tolerate having to touch/see myself. I am dehydrated but I can't see a way of making myself increase my fluids.

I am a nurse so I know all the physical effects. I just don't know how to handle the emotional side.

Thanks for your reply.

 

[Neverthesame]

What if you were to fill a little sqeeze bottle with water, when you are done wash it off.

Or, (I swear this not a joke.) There is a product available that may help you.
https://www.shewee.com

 

[Sandstone]

.Would it be any better if you went to the loo in the dark? I have times when I can't bear to see my body, and I have to shower with the light off and the curtains closed.

 

[Friday]

What if you were to fill a little sqeeze bottle with water, when you are done wash it off.

Or, (I swear this not a joke.) There is a product available that may help you.
https://www.shewee.com

This one, too! :D

Link Removed

- Peeing in the shower. While I sometimes shower 5-10 times a day... I realize most people only shower once or twice. That's still better than only peeing once!

- A follow up to the waterbottle (portable bidet!)... Purchasing an actual bidet.

- Cop-a-squat. That position rarely leaves any moisture behind that needs wiping. While you could buy a Japanese "squatty-potty" if this position works for you, you can also just use pee pads available in medical supply & pets stores.

- Meds. Especially when a thing has a history? So I'm not just fighting the trigger/stressor, but also a built up aversion? I'll use meds to get myself okay with a thing on meds, then taper myself off until I'm okay off meds as well. As an example... Short acting med "every" time I need to pee, then most of the time, then half of the time, then a quarter of the time, then intermittently. (Obviously, if a med lasts 4 hours, then not taking it prior to each micturation, but 3-4 times a day. Then 3x. 2x. 1x. occasionally.)

- Catheterization long term clearly has it's downsides, but better than the whole kidney failure & death thing.

 

[Rumors]

How do you shower? I guess I would have to ask you if it is your desire to not be living? I certainly don't mean for that to sound condescending but it is a question you have to ask yourself. If you feel like you can, you have to try and say to yourself, "I am going to take good care of my body. When I was younger no one took care of my body and that really sucked but I am in control now and I can make a choice to take care of myself because I AM WORTHY." Yes, you are worthy. Find some things that you love about yourself and do them. Maybe you paint, read, write, make music, play soccer? I don't know, but please go do these things and repeat to yourself that you are good and you deserve to take care of yourself. If you don't drink water, you are going to get very sick and may have damage that is irreversible. Please, please take care.

 

[void]

@OP
please clarify if you have reported this to your T.

You are in medical danger.
You are risking your life.
I empathize with the torment but this is 100% self destruction.
If you don't have a T., you need to see a doctor today and get hydrated.
As a Nurse you know I am right.

What if you used Depends?
No looking or touching and no wetness.
Just micturate and throw away.

 

[super_saiyan]

@OP
please clarify if you have reported this to your T.

You are in medical danger.
You are risking your lif...

My therapist knows, yes. I am in therapy but very stagnant with this issue. I have agreed to increase my fluids by 50ml.

 

[Neverthesame]

How long have you been doing this for @super_saiyan ? Days, weeks?

A little worried about you, nor do I imagine I'm the only one.

50ml? That's little more than a shot glass worth. Still, it's more than before so it's a step in the right direction.

 

[illusionist]

You can buy a bidet toilet seat that will jet water and blow dry for roughly £190.

Not practical for the work place but may make life easier at home.

 

[Hmmm]

How long have you been doing this for @super_saiyan ? Days, weeks?

A little wor...

More than about 18 months.