Why Is It A Big Deal If I Cut My Breasts?

[Lugugo]

Her job is to keep you alive. She isn't a medical expert, and she was likely concerned about the more likely possibility of killing yourself cutting there. Cutting of the wrists is generally less likely to be as dangerous.

Nothing for you to be ashamed about, just continue working on. How are things going now?

 

[Oluzo]

I guess I just remain confused about why it's so bad. I mean, isn't wrist cuttibg potentially more fatal?

I'm still struggling. Only cut once since I wrote this last but I wantbto cut more and I'm having. Lot of trouble convincing myself that I should stop.

I know part of "getting better" is not cutting but I guess I need some really specific and concrete reasonsnwhy it isn't good for me to do it because Im having a really hard time convincing myself to stop.

 

[Iloj]

I know part of "getting better" is not cutting but I guess I need some really specific and concrete reasonsnwhy it isn't good for me to do it because Im having a really hard time convincing myself to stop.

The reason to stop is in order to stop supporting whatever negative thoughts are driving you to cut in the first place.

So: why do you cut?

 

[Kita]

Because it resets me - whatever really bad thing that was happening disappears when I cut. It instantly erases all the badness I feel, and nothing else is capable of that instantaneous relief.

 

[Ocuvi]

What kinds of bad things do you typically need to reset from?

 

[Isen]

Memories, and feelings. Overwhelming feelings, mostly, of shame and humiliation. And feeling sexual at all makes me want to cut more than anything else - I find my sexual fantasies and expires so, so repulsive. (They're probably all trauma related).

 

[Hucor]

Ok, look at it this way: cutting is a result of the overwhelming feelings of shame. Those feelings are what you are truly being hurt by. You need to keep working on addressing the trauma, so those feelings - that pain - can be alleviated.

In the meanwhile - cutting is reinforcing - deepening - those bad feelings. You are countering pain with pain. So instead of helping yourself you are actually hurting yourself more.

Cutting is dangerous. No matter how careful you are, there will be a time where you slip, cut too deep, or get infected. Cutting is like writing your shame all over your body - while in therapy, you are trying to do just the opposite: convert your shame into something that doesn't hurt.

 

[Ifaw]

Thnaks you. That's actually really helpful; I appreciate it.

I know that cuttibg is writing my shame into my body, but sometimes I just feel so horrible about myself that I believe that I should be outwardly marked in this way, that I'm too broken and too awful to deserve to not have scars. And it's been so many years at this point that it doesn't matter any aye - I will be scared for the rest of my life.

 

[Utegi]

Yesterday is not an accurate predictor of tomorrow.

 

[Fuduvub]

I don't have any words of advice. But I know what you are going through. I use to cut myself ALOT. Especially my face. I have scars all over my left arm (I'm right handed).

You must be in a huge amount of pain and you are turning inward. I am sorry you are going through such a tough time.

Wishing you peace and healing.
Heather

 

[Ada]

I just want to rip my Breasts off, hurt hem so badly, make them go away. Feeling sexual is my worst shame. I feel so so dirty whenever I have thoughts about sex and I just want to cut until the thoughts are gone and I'm punished enough. I know this sounds crazy. But I don't know how to stop it.

 

[Okafo]

Can yousee a therapist who specialises in sexual trauma?