Indecisive About Career Change....

[J_trustno1]

Hi again everyone. Apologies for not replying on the previous thread. I'm not mean to ignore you guys or anything, it's just that my I've been feeling cold and empty for a long time that I have trouble being social :(..

As you have heard from the title of this thread and my previous thread that I'm looking for a career change.

I have two options to pick from but I don't know what will be my decision. These options are:

1. Graduate diploma in Project management
2. Graduate diploma in secondary school teaching

My background:

-Master of Engineering in Chemical & materials Engineering (First class honors),
-BSc (Honors) in Chemistry and
-BSc in Chemistry & statistics

My Health:

I'm pretty fragile. I get dermatitis and breathing problems being in industry environment due to my exposure to toxic chemicals in undergrad and post-grad labs. I can't stand heat or sunlight because I get migraines. I can't stand loud noises because it leads to migraines again.

What I love and my personality:

• I love Science and it's always been my favourite subject since I was a kid! Yes!
• I've always enjoyed facts and theory and finding out why things works.
• I'm a very analytical person
• I'm a methodical person
• I LOVE textbooks and that's why I still have all my high school and university textbooks with me. I still have my notebooks from high school too. I can't get enough of stationary or books because I value them a lot.
• I've always respected my teachers and treated them well because I saw as my guru's from whom I learned but not all kids are like that.
• I've always loved how teachers graded your tests and your eagerness to find out what mark you got. I just can't get over it!

I enjoy learning and can't get enough of it. I wanted to be a teacher when I was a kid but in my country teachers were allowed to hit kids with canes so I didn't want to hurt kids. However, here in NZ and other western countries, it's the opposite. In here it's the kids beating teachers and seeing my asshole teenage cousins growing to disrespect me I dropped the idea of secondary school teaching. And instead I wanted to do a PhD and become a university lecturer but seeing the PhD students and post-docs struggling with jobs and working endless hours in labs, I decided NOT to end up in academia.

At the same time I value my physical and mental health. I'm not chasing after becoming rich but wanting a career that fulfills me. The idea of secondary school (year 9 - year 13) teaching scares me simply because of hormonal teenagers behavior and handling a large class of 25 - 30 students. But I still love science and stationary and books.

My issues:

• someone told me that I don't have the personality of a teacher so I shouldn't teach.
• With a business course I will be working in industries with engineering/IT/Science backgrounds. I don't know what kind of people I'll be dealing with and I'm NOT a good business person.
• I know I can excel in anything I put my mind to but I know when it comes to dealing with difficult people I have trouble. I have trouble with authority and I HATE having a boss asking me for deadlines or nagging me. With the business course I'll be a project manager but then again I will have to manage people below me and that is going to be a task because people are DIFFICULT!!!!! For me, less people the better. I'd rather talk to the walls than talking to grumpy old people.
• I worry if I don't become a good teacher, I'll ruin my students lives. I can't be a selfish teacher running after money but someone who is a good example for her students and who is willing to put in the extra effort so her students can get somewhere. But i don't know if I have what it takes to be a genuine teacher.
• with a business course, I'll be dealing with adults. I may sit in a office with an Air conditioning but I don't know if this job won't have pressure.
• Lastly, one of the wrong wrong decision about going to business is that I might meet someone lol but I know that's ridiculous. You can't get someone by doing some degree, that's just bullshit.

Anyway, can you guys direct me somewhere as I am in a turmoil. I have seen too many career counselors that they can't help me anymore. I am going to discuss this with my counselor next week when I see her but for the meanwhile I need some advice.

Note: I've never been a good sales person BUT I did well with theory when I studied accounting in high school and university :).

Thanks for the help in advance.

P.S. I feel I don't have the self-esteem and the patience to become a teacher right now. I don't know how teachers can yell/shout at students without having sore throat. I don't want to be animalistic when it comes to dealing with other people or kids. I want to be sophisticated and be presentable in whatever I chose to do..

 

[ms spock]

There are heaps of options for managing students that don't involve shouting and yelling at students - the world is not entirely like your family of origin home was like - there are other ways to interact with students. It takes a little experience and it takes a little practice but I am sure you would get it in the end - like everything worth having - you have to work hard at it and practice it.

 

[ms spock]

If you love Science then for goodness sakes then be a brilliant Science teacher - you have the passion - so share it.

I am sure once you get on top of your distorted cognitions and practice dealing with people - everyone find people difficult at some point of their day - you will get there.

 

[ms spock]

So to manage difficult people you need:

Disputing distorted cognitions aka David Burns and I know you have the book "Feeling Good". Join some threads that break these apart - do it each day for 30 days.

Distress Tolerance aka DBT is you new best friend. http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ Get the workbook - do it - you are a good worker - you can do this.

Self Compassion: http://self-compassion.org/ Read the book - down load or listen to the free audio. Or find one that resonates with you - if that one doesn't work for you - then do some research until you find one that works for you.

The Mindful Way through Depression - which don't worry about the Mindfulness what this books says in terms of distorted thinking and rumination patterns of those of us that have depression is worth it's weight in gold. I have listened to the audiobook many, many times.

Practice - get the skills and then practice again and again until it is not so stressful to do. It takes practice - and the discipline you show when you study and exercise shows that you have got this.

Set time limits on your ruminations - you can think about and write threads about this for the next five years - don't get stuck in this stuff.

 

[ms spock]

Perhaps writing textbook is something that you could do?

Or some other thing that I think @Fadeaway suggested for you? Some type of technical writing?

If you don't like people and you don't want to deal with people, or you don't want to do the work to learn to manage difficult people, then you need to find other careers other than Teaching or Business.

 

[ms spock]

Get a job any job - because anything is better than sitting around ruminating on things all day. You will only learn to manage people by actually interacting and practicing with them.

Possibly do an 8 week Mindfulness course and practice each day and see if it is for you.

 

[J_trustno1]

Thanks @Ms Spock for the positive feedback. I'm really confused about my life now. I applied for so many jobs and beeb rejected. I have only been selected for a data entry job after applying for over 300 jobs and that job wasn't satisfactory. Then after over 200 applications I was accepted for chemical inventory job and that job didn't last more than 3 weeks because of respiratory and skin problems. Now i don't even know what to do with my life anymore. I only get 2 jobs after applying for 500+ jobs. I had my CV and cover letter checked by over 20 people. I changed it more than 500 times and now I don't know what to do anymore :( :depressed: :cry:.. Lastly, I have been to Career counselors/advisors and they can't help me unless I know what i want to do with my life. I'm just lost and all my education is just a waste :(.

 

[ms spock]

So don't go into rumination! @Jass_T!

Your thread clearly shows that you do know what to do! That is to search for other options! You are doing that! How brave! How proactive!

Many, many, many people have the same job applications process as you do! It is part of being in the Western World of Work these days with dodgy unemployment figures that don't let people know the real story. Don't personalise it (hey that is a distorted cognitions - and I am using it in context! How cool is that?) So don't personalise it. Stride forward in a new direction.

You have not been rejected personally Jass_T - you weren't what was required at the time. That is a very different thing indeed.

 

[J_trustno1]

But I don't know what to study out of these two. I know i want to study. I've been crying for the past 30mins because i feel like a failure and stuck. I don't have a career. I don't even have a relationship and I don't want to be stuck like this forever. It's been 2 years of this frustrating phase that i want to break out :(. I've just had enough. I know I can do a lot more than I was offered in previous jobs but I don't know about my career anymore :(.

 

[ms spock]

It is hard not to go in to thought cascades when you are uncertain.

 

[ms spock]

... all my education is just a waste :(.

So objectively if you look at this - you know that is a distorted cognition. The statement all my education is a waste is a gross generalisation. All that education gives you a stepping stone to a range of choices and directions. You can now choose from business or teaching - that is not a waste of education - if it was a waste of education then you would have absolutely no options, and this is clearly not accurate.

 

[J_trustno1]

This makes sense. I think I need to think thoroughly about which option to choose from.