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@Sammyiam I love that we are able to use these threads to be silly and naughty and irreverent. I wasnt sure if you were referring to stuff that had gone on in the forum or stuff at home, but whatever it is, I'm glad you got a smile. :)

@FridayJones Probably is PTSD arching up, wanting to burn the house. I like the idea of burning my sister's house. I agree totally with the land value thing. The bank doesn't need the house. But they would charge you and get all legal on your ass and carry on about it. You know, put you in...

I make cupcakes with ganache or sour cream inside them as well as frosting on top, so it's like an extra surprise. I love cupcakes. I make hair garlands out of twisted willow and dried roses. Handpaint T-shirts. My husband does the outline and I paint them. I made this door from scratch and...

I like to meet my husband after work every Friday night with our little dog and sit at an outdoor cafe and have a coffee. Then have pizza, or bruschetta or a yummy pasta dish and talk about our week, then go home and watch TV or a movie. Simple, but's that's all I need. I love to see people...

I think sour cream on the corn chips would be great.

I just thought I would update this thread, for anyone who may be interested and also for tracking my own progress. I have been on the Zyban/Buproprion for 6 weeks now. We put my dosage up to one full tablet a day 150mg for ten days. I can honestly say I did not like the side effects that...

I do it too. I think it is also to do with depression. I also daydream about my abusers on purpose, read books related to abuse and death, both autobiographies and text books. Maybe It's possible it's not such a bad thing to do. Maybe it is like exposure therapy and the triggering gets less and...

Don't do it. Go buy a blow-up bed and sleep in with your husband and your kids.

Noise.....and you can't wear headphones or earmuffs or earplugs in case some bastard walks up to you and taps you on the shoulder unexpectedly. Then you either vomit, pee your pants or punch them in the face.

I would often put myself to sleep daydreaming about smothering my elderly mother. I would include taking the pillow off intermittently to see the look of surprise on her face. I would daydream about burning down my sister's house. I would daydream about putting testosterone blockers into my...

@ghotiff Oh, that's perfect. It's so soothing for me when it takes a long time. It makes me go off into La La Land and that's even better than Shimmerzville. Of course, I'll have to find something you dont want to do that I can do. Not to be equal, rather not to be a burden. :) Wouldn't it be...

Can we have lots of flowers in the budget? Planted everywhere and we're allowed to cut some to put in our cave/shell/house. Roses, Lisianthus, Baby's Breath, Ivy, Snapdragons. Can we have free chocolate at the cafes please? Are we allowed to say f##k all the time without saying it quietly or...

The words "breathe in, breathe out" would be banned. Fkg stupid concept. If we didn't breath in and out we would be dead. Doing it slower does nothing for PTSD except piss off the sufferer.

I agree with 'no singing bowls', they piss me off. Also no incense as the smoky smell irritates me. No patchouli oil wearing. Or that 'White Linen' perfume that makes me nauseous. We could have many cafes. Hubs of gathering. We could have a colour code dot system. Sticky dots to wear on our...

Thank you for your helpful input @AngelPaws14. Details help so much to find a plan. I actually signed up with a personal trainer yesterday and started pilates classes two weeks ago. I can feel my body again. I hope the support of the trainer helps me get my physical body back to how I enjoy it...

Hmm! How strange. When I wrote the first post, I wrote that all of the rumination had gone. I also wrote that I was not craving carbs any more. These are the two things I wrote in the last post were still with me to a degree. I am still ruminating, but now it's whether/how the medication is...

I guess when I really boil it down I was hoping the new meds would take away the rumination completely. Allow me to stop the 'self-observation". @Born to Run, Maybe I am hyper-sensitive to what I view as negative suggestions or suggestions that are not balanced out with positives. It could...

I think that is a great guideline. It does help me, thank you. I can now start to build on exactly what that would look like for me. (A therapist asked me the same thing once in relation to marriage) What would a good marriage for me look like. This is when I find writing with chalk on the...

Go back to the questions I asked. I was specifically addressing people who are taking Buproption. 1. "Why can't we tell if we are feeling better or not?" 2. " Is it too much to ask to feel good". I was gathering information to gauge the effects of this med. I never said anything about...

@Nam Thank you. I guess that feeling sad etc is a part of what a normal human feels and we dont realise at first that this is what we will have to learn to deal with. PS Today I have my very first personal training session to exercise. I agree with putting up the dose and my doc will support...

@ihateusernames Thank you so much. That is exactly the kind of detail I needed to hear. I can work with that. I will increase the dose after another couple of weeks and then reduce the Pristiq to see if that helps. All these plans before feel I have got it sorted with meds. I am pretty sure...

Two pilates classes last week. Two the week before. Personal trainer booked for Monday. Going to use some of my small TPD (Totally and permanently disabled) payout to try to get my body back to 57kgs from 73kgs all due to inhaling cake and bread and not exercising consistently since diagnosis 7...

When you walk past a cafe and a pretty woman smiles and says "hello, how are you?" You respond, but think "Fk, who is that, I can't remember who that is. I know her. I don't know if she is a goodie or a baddie..fk, fk, fk". Then two minutes later you realise it's your hairdresser.

Why can't we tell if we are feeling better or not? When I go over my symptoms that I listed 20 days ago, the lack of those symptoms still stands. Yet, I still don't feel I am as good as I want to be. If I am to analyse it, I no longer want to kill myself and before starting Zyban I was having...

I've never met a dog who was an asshole. Maybe scared, abused, fragile, but not an asshole. That's why they're good for us. We don't have to worry we are dealing with yet another asshole. We can relax.