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I'm trying to figure out how I'm allowing myself to go back into these horrible emotional places over and over - crying easily and losing my shit. So, I'm writing about my experience this evening to you all. I already wrote in my journal, and that got me to this point. I'm extremely triggered...

CONGRATULATIONS This gives me so much hope! I am on medical deferral to start my Phd in fall 2015. I've gotten better but still have a way to go. Thanks for sharing.

Oh sweetie I'm sorry. Do you live in a cold or warm environment?

I get panic attacks too. Long, hot showers is the only thing I've found so far that can get me out of one. And you're not a junior. Or discredited. Each persons experience and history is unique and uniquely important.

Ha, ironically, I just found out today that I have a bit of Asperger's. The process you describe here of categorizing important things like God, love, forgiveness, thanks, etc in this way, @atthree, is like a brain party. I'm interested in the nature of the internal/emotional processing you...

What fabulous game concept. Thanks for sharing.

Thanks @Loner and @Snowwhite. It seems that my ability to engage in any sort of social interaction without being triggered is waning by the day; my PTSD is getting worse by the day, when I thought it couldn't get any worse. I sincerely appreciate your attempts and your responses here...

EDITED: I originally wrote that I was going to ask a moderator to delete this thread, but it appears that that is not allowed so I have edited this post... This thread is a constant trigger for me because individuals are continuing to tell me what I "should" be doing by giving unsolicited...

I'm sorry to hear about the pain that PTSD has caused you and your wife. From your descriptions, your wife's symptoms of misinterpreting emotional abuse are nearly identical in nature to my symptoms with PTSD in my relationship with my boyfriend. I can't see the truth, I constantly feel...

Hi @Snowwhite, as I told Abstract: I understand the science behind it and what you are saying; I conduct research on nutrition for a living. Perhaps I should not have posted this "vent," because hearing people tell me what I "should" do is a PTSD trigger for me. Its a deeply engrained and...

Thanks, @Loner, I think @Abstract hit the hammer on the nail here regarding the psychological component being more important. I do also have stomach issues from both psychological stress and from past eating disorders.

Sigh, this is where my control issues come in. I want to be the one in control of my eating, not a "schedule" that I "have" to follow regardless of how I feel. Thanks for helping me see that, @Abstract. Please don't bother trying to convince me to "just do it," because it will be better for me...

Great article!

As the title says, I just want to vent a little... Using marijuana has helped me put on weight - I was 112lbs at 5'7" (I'm female)...underweight. I was back in my healthy weight range last week, at 121 lbs...but just 4 days without using marijuana has resulted in a 2 lb weight loss. Today, I...

I'm experiencing this right now from the other end - I was diagnosed with complex PTSD last September. I've always had some minor PTSD symptoms that were manageable, but for me, the trigger that caused the PTSD to finally emerge full-blown after all these years was because I had fallen in love...

Can you as your therapist if you can see him/her two or three times a week as you're getting started in this especially difficult time? I felt the same way and I'm in therapy two times per week and e-mail or phone chat with my therapist a few times a week on top of that. If you need more, you...

This sounds like it could be a part of it...or perhaps, "relief from being me." I often feel angry that I have to "be with myself" 24/7. I'm not really able to view things in the dream as "symbols." This might be because my therapist says I behave with a sense of denial about how I feel - I...

Like many of you all, I am plagued with horrible nightmares relating to my abuse - physical, visual, and auditory sensations and experiences in my sleep. However, after learning in therapy that I frequently "detach" from myself as a defense mechanism to deal with cognitive dissonance and...

I recently shared (via e-mail) with my new PTSD specialist therapist about my constant, intense feelings of worthlessness, inadequacy, and self-hatred. He explained how my emotional self-concept is not tied with my logical thoughts, but that we can work on it so that what I logically know to be...

The guy seemed very knowledgeable and I liked his style. I learned that he gives talks on PTSD at conferences...he's been doing therapy for 30 years. While I think it takes at least a few sessions to assess compatibility, I have a very good feeling about him. His discussions and descriptions of...

The appointment is in a few hours and my stomach is in knots... I can't eat or drink water and just moving my torso causes the pains in my stomach to get worse. I think it's because of anxiety, but I often have an emotional disconnect - I don't know how I'm feeling, I just rely on these physical...

I'll join too: 1. Identifying the times when I have irrational thought patterns associated with my PTSD, and learning to differentiate these thoughts from "real"/"true" thoughts. This usually involves incorrectly perceived mistreatment or control from other people, or general feelings of...

I didn't realize this was a validated psychological construct/official diagnosis. I believe I am on that spectrum as well. I actually found an abbreviated version of the quiz. Here it is if anyone else is interested in seeing their score. It could be a useful tool for therapy feedback...

Wow - how eloquently stated! I feel like you just cracked open my skull, inspected my brain, and wrote down the perfect analogy of its contents.

I was that way for much of my life... "tough", didn't care, looked out for myself. It doesn't work. If there is trauma, there will be defense mechanisms in place. I was so "tough" that I repressed all the memories...but they come back, in dreams, in the middle of a normal conversation with...