1.
Xander's School For Broke Dick Dogs
(Xavier's School For Gifted Youngsters)
-Or-
Sister Margaret's School For Wayward Girls
Humming 'Somewhere I belong' by LinkinPark
2. Ye merciful gods. The MUCUS.
- My face feels like I snorted crank laced with rat poison, bleach, & shards of glass... On the upside my face feels better than my head.
- if I drill a hole in my head, will the mucus leak out, or will the cavernous echoing vacuum suck even more stuff in and my head...& instead of threatening to explode actually will??? Either way. Sounds like a win. <insert sound of drill being fired up>
- If I tilt my head in certain ways (like those puzzles with the ball on the twisted metal maze wire thing) I can make a "nosebleed" with gushing mucus! Or clear fluid. (My nose is sad? There there nose. Nuffink to cry about.) I suppose I could just blow my nose like a normal person. But this is waaaaaay more fun. Gross. But fun. (Cheer up, nose! This will be great!)
- Will commit smallish acts of treason, and larger felonies, for decongestants.
- Damn I'm glad I was in to see the Doc twice last week looking all healthy and normal & pis sing clean. Because going in for a med-check sick 3 times in a row would just look suspiciously addicty. Nope! Been off my meds for weeks. Jusht my braim eeking oub by nobe. Shuspect vaccine you gabe be last bweek dishtracted by ibbune syshtem. Preddy babass colb I'be gah gobing ob here... Then again, maybe I'll be all better by then? <crosses fingers> Oh. Cool. Look at my fingers. (No. I'm not all sick and distract able at all. Why do you ask?) Now what was I talking about, again?
3. if I eat my coffee with a spoon, does it count as soup? Can I say "I had soup today."? :O_o:
4. No! You will not think about that right now! I see you thinking about it! Stop it. No thinkin about that, either. Or that. Moratorium, bitches. On those entire lines of thought. Yes. And that one, too. Lalalalalala. Stop it. For real. Cease & desist.
5. You will not sit down and play video games about normal life. You will get up and go slay dragons. <.<