After Trauma Therapy Ends

[frogthroat]

I ended with my therapist in October and she believed that I was well enough to figure things on my own and seeing another therapist would just open it all up again and I agreed.
I've been doing well but I wonder if anyone here felt blank after therapy ended. For some reason, I felt like I was going to be a totally different person and I'm just...me.
I'm not through the woods yet. I know I'm still subconsciously clinging to my trauma as my identity. I'm still VERY much learning to live and grow with chronic mental illness and I just feel like I'm I'm limbo waiting for something to happen. I know I have to get up and at least try my best to accomplish anything in my life and that's not putting myself down. I've done years of work to get here. It's just Idk what to do now and I'm not expecting anyone here to answer that question. I'm just if and how anybody got through this period.

 

[arfie]

my most formal therapy was with the veteran's administration. the end of that formal therapy was coached as, "graduation to therapy maintenance." there is no cure for the common me, but i had mastered enough tools to manage my condition without the formal therapy. in my own recovery, i began to rely more heavily on peer support than pro support. my own condition is severe enough that i don't believe i'll ever be able to go it alone, but independence doesn't require loneliness. in fact, isolating remains one of my more therapy resistant symptoms and my peer supporters are priceless in managing that symptom.

the pro support network is still there if i need it. who knows what the morrow may bring?

 

[Sideways]

she believed that I was well enough to figure things on my own and seeing another therapist would just open it all up again and I agreed.

Wha…?

There’s 2 parts to this, neither of which make sense to me:
1) when you say “well enough to figure things out on your own”, is that something she said? Was that her idea?

I look forward to the day that I may no longer need a T, but honestly, I’m not sure that will ever happen. I need them way less (as in, I’m currently at once/month, rather than 5 days a week), but…weird that they don’t consider that having help to ‘figure things out’ is less preferable than having help?

Maybe that was because of that particular modality they offered?

Such a weird thing to say…!

2) therapy doesn’t need to ‘open things up’. Psychotherapy does. But there are loads of other types of therapy that are skills based (DBT, ACT, etc), or behavioural (Behavioural activation), or working through current issues with a view to being more skilled at dealing with issues (CBT).

Needing support is human. We’re mammals, so supporting each other is how we function best.

Maybe you’re done with the type of therapy you were having, but other types of support would be helpful? I’ve done loads of different types of therapy, and definitely recommend a multi-modal approach - finding the therapy that suits your issues now. With a few to making life more enjoyable.

 

[Ecdysis]

I've always done "maintenance therapy" after the more intense therapy phases... That may involve just checking in 2 or 3 times a year, if things are going smoothly, but also with the option to book more appointments if the need arises. Also, self-help groups or similar can be helpful for those maintenance phases.

 

[PamelaS]

I ended with my therapist in October and she believed that I was well enough to figure things on my own and seeing another therapist would just open it all up again and I agreed.
I've been doing well but I wonder if anyone here felt blank after therapy ended. For some reason, I felt like I was going to be a totally different person and I'm just...me.
I'm not through the woods yet. I know I'm still subconsciously clinging to my trauma as my identity. I'm still VERY much learning to live and grow with chronic mental illness and I just feel like I'm I'm limbo waiting for something to happen. I know I have to get up and at least try my best to accomplish anything in my life and that's not putting myself down. I've done years of work to get here. It's just Idk what to do now and I'm not expecting anyone here to answer that question. I'm just if and how anybody got through this period.

I’m glad you reached out with this. From the responses it’s okay to have something to hold onto, even if the grip is lessened. Wishing you well as you explore options that are a good fit for you right now. I just started trauma informed therapy. Excited to try something new.

 

[Friday]

What @Sideways said.

 

[Movingforward10]

Also what @Sideways said.

I ended with my therapist in October and she believed that I was well enough to figure things on my own

Did you think you were? Did you want to end?
Do you think you are now?

I ended therapy in August last year after 4 1/2 years. And then restarted it in October last year, just two months later as things weren't going according to plan..initally for a "check in session" and then for "6 sessions" and then in January we agreed it will take as long as it takes.

The decision to end and start and what this start looks like, were all mine.

Did your T leave it open to go back?
Do you want to start with someone new?

I think there is the deep trauma therapy. And then I think there is value in something else. Or the old trauma needs revisiting in another form.

 

[dharmaBum]

...but independence doesn't require loneliness...

Wise words! This really strikes a chord with me today. Thank you for sharing.

 

[PamelaS]

Wise words! This really strikes a chord with me today. Thank you for sharing.

I don’t know if I will ever be able to let go of my therapist to guide me through the process of healing. I have done without a really good therapist for many many years. I finally have a good one and expect to be working through a lot of things over a long period of time. Glad that you’re seeing the end of the tunnel. Best wishes in moving forward in your healing. Don’t be afraid to re-initiate therapy if you determine that it is needed. It’s not a failure. It’s a process and processes aren’t in a straight line. Wishing you well.