Analyzing Dreams and Uncovering the Subconscious Mind : Analyzing Dreams and Uncovering the Subconsc

[tude]

Here you go gang...a dream I had in December. I have to be honest with you, remembering my bad dreams and nightmares can be like remembering my patients- disturbing, haunting, and vivid.

Outside of the ER was an angry mob. I was outside with the security team. Next, I saw M***, tied down to a stretcher being kidnapped by the mob. He didn't look afraid and wasn't struggling. I watched and did nothing thinking he can take care of himself. Next, I stole a truck that looked like an ambulance. It was old, faded red and more of a work truck used by trademen. I was on the run driving through some city.

Next, I was on top of a tall building. It was a public lookout place of sorts. I was sitting on the inner guardrail. When a man startled me and said, "be careful," I moved to the outer guardrail. Everything on the ground was quite small, which let me know how high up we were. The man collapsed. I thought he was faking it to get me to come off the rail. I looked to see if he was breathing. Shit, he wasn't faking it! I got down to go to him.

Then, still on the rooftop, I was among my family- both the living and the dead. They were just sitting there looking at me as if waiting on me. I even pointed out to them, "Wait, you're dead." They simply agreed.

I was in the old truck again on the city highway. The highway almost reached the height of the skyscrapers. I was in awe of one particular building. It was sleek, modern, dark gray and black. It looked like a grouping of medieval, castle watchtowers.

Next, came the most disturbing part. I watched a woman fall. She looked lifeless, i.e. not flailing her arms and legs. I heard(and felt, I think) the thud and crunch of her bones as she hit a balcony or something sticking out from the building. She didn't stop there. She bounced off. I heard another thud and crunch as she hit the ground. It made me cringe both times. I wasn't on the ground. I had an aerial view up high from a building across the street. I heard the faint sound of a chopper overhead.

Not far from there, because the buildings looked similar, I was in a one-room tent with a mother and two kids. This tent was their home. It wasn't destitute. It was brightly colored and new. Just primitive, I guess. I had a sense they were in danger- like they were not safe for some reason. I woke up scared.

Later, I will comment on this dream. Until then, have fun with it.

tude :)

 

[Seeking_Nirvana]

Hi Tude, It took a lot of trust to post this dream. Good job!

One important thing to remember is that dream people are usually a representation of yourself unless you know them. Most of the symbols are too. So the angry mob is you. Your anger is related to your job. You feel the need to keep yourself safe from your own anger (security team)

Seeing M*** tied down to a stretcher being kidnapped would represent that your job takes over your life and maybe M***s and that is why he is not scared or struggling because you accept you have to work and deal with it. (That's why you stayed and watched because you know you’re strong enough to deal with the job)

Usually automobiles represent our body or our journey in life but because your job requires you to drive or be in an automobile it may vary in what this means. My best guess here is that you want to escape from your job because it has a bad effect on your body.

The building is you, looking for a place to be at peace. But you can't find peace, because your job follows you no matter where you go. There seems to be an undertone of suicidal thinking here with the guardrail and the man telling you to be careful?

It appears you look down on people who commit suicide or feel a lot of things in life are beneath you. Maybe because you've seen to many suicide attempts that were just people trying to get attention with no intention of actually do it. Trying to determine who is really trying to kill themselves and those who are just wasting your time for attention causes problems for you, and causes you to doubt yourself at times. Your family shows up to support you. You put your family in this dream so you may need to admit to yourself that you could use family support with these issues with regard to your job.

The highway indicates living fast and reaching new heights in your thinking. But then you’re brought back to reality with seeing the building that resembles medieval castle watch overs. Castles represent keeping intruders out and the owner in. It appears you don't trust easily and keep others at a very far distance. (I already knew that based on the post in the forum LOL) But some one else had a dream about castles here and I told them they had the same issue. Trust.

The woman falling would represent how you felt at the time you had this dream. Kind of like just giving up and falling without trying to save yourself or it may be giving up on your job. On the way down she hit something twice. (I had a similar dream where a child hit something on the way down) It is you and both times your hitting something would indicate a break in mental health (nervous breakdown) or some severe panic attacks. Since you had an aerial view you probably dissociated during these times. But with the chopper coming your health most likely bounced back real quick. But this break left you feeling like your psyche was less than safe (living in a tent) and you were concerned how these breaks were going to affect you later on in life. You didn't feel completely needy but felt you could use some more support.

I get the feeling something happened to you (other than your job) that causes these problems, but only you can decide if you want to talk about that.

Take what fits and toss the rest
Tammy

 

[linasmom]

Hey everyone,

I've had tons of nightmares lately that have really bothered me. Most of them are occurring in a very lucid state. I posted them all in my diary - here is the first of four, all in one week:

My father asked me to cop some cocaine for him (weight) from a good friend of his. I contacted the friend and he told me to work with his "assistant" - some girl who took bids online for the weight. Somehow, I ended up sitting next to her in this barren room while she sat online taking the bids and I was on my laptop bidding on the weight. I won the bid at $6,000.00. But when I won, she immediately ran over to my dad's friend and said "we finally hit $6,000.00." I got pissed because I realized that she was the one who was bidding against me in order to jack the price up so I said to the girl, "you're not the seller and I'm not dealing with you, get my dad's friend on the phone now."

She got my dad's friend on the phone and he told me that I didn't have to deal with her anymore but that I still had to come up with the 6 grand. I called my dad but couldn't get in touch with him, I kept calling and calling and leaving numerous messages, but couldn't reach him and he didn't call back.

They ended up taking me back to the drug house where they were holding me captive until I could come up with the 6 grand. It was really dark and I couldn't make out anything (for some reason, they never actually took me inside of the house, they kept me outside) except for a big dog with a glowing red mask on its face. The dog was waiting for the command to devour me. I was just staring at the glowing red mask and then I woke up.

(this leads to me an additional question - sometimes I dream in color and sometimes I don't, this nightmare was in color, does that have any meaning?)

I appreciate any comments.

Best,
Rachel

(oh yeah, as an aside, my father used to sell a lot of drugs, but he NEVER involved me.)

 

[Seeking_Nirvana]

Hi Rachel,
I want to start off telling you that when I first started taking stimulants for ADD I was having dreams of searching for crack or cocaine. I couldn’t understand why because I didn’t have any urges for cocaine and I have never done crack. Eventually I made the connection that in my mind there was such a negative stigma connected to stimulants that I felt I was doing drugs.

So you might want to ask yourself if there is a new medication your taking that is making the connection to cocaine, or if you were once addicted or did cocaine then maybe your having some urges for this or another addictive substance?

Your father represents an aspect in your own personality. Maybe there is something he did that you can see yourself doing. “Cop” would be a pun on words with regard to the illegal nature of the drug. The “weight” might be another pun on words that have to do with a weight problem. Maybe the thought has crossed your mind that cocaine will help you lose weight if you’re feeling heavy. If not, then I’m not sure what the first part means.

Sitting in a barren room would indicate how your feeling (desolate) with a situation you’re dealing with. The bidding seems to be associated to e-bay? But the meaning is that you’re screwing yourself over some how. If it has to do with considering doing drugs or another substance, then that would most likely be what you’re doing in screwing yourself over. Or it could be that your trying to "one up" on some one as in a contest in order to win the prize (ego), but it's only causing you frustration.

There seems to be a communication problem with some one over money and your being held captive in your mind until you come up with a solution to this money issue. However, money could represent something else in this dream.

The number 6 in numerology means - Harmony, beauty, nurturing, love, marriage, family, responsibility, understanding, sympathy, healing, empathic, perfectionist, order, duty, comfort, service.

The assistant represents a part of your personality, which is the opposite of what the number 6 means, and you realize you don’t have to deal with that part of yourself anymore.

When they take you back to be held captive it appears some one is causing you to be very angry (Red). The dream is telling you to let the anger go, and the nature of the number 6 will return and be your main characteristics.

This anger is defense mechanism that you use to protect yourself. Try to figure out how to avoid the person who is causing you this grief, or accept them and you will start to feel better because you don’t want this anger to devour you.

Usually when I dream in vivid colors there is a very important message in it. The colors usually have a meaning.

If this doesn’t fit what is going on in your life let me know and I will look at it with another angle. I would need to know the nature of the drug use though. Also, feel free to record your other dreams over here and I will try to help you with them.

 

[tude]

Linasmom,

For me, your dream contained elements of betrayal and abandonment.

 

[tude]

Tammy thanks for sharing your thoughts. I too noticed a feeling of not being safe. As for the anger, perhaps it is towards myself and not my job? Maybe I think I should be like M***, unafraid and not struggling? You know how they say houses represent your psyche? Do ya think in addition to the castle fortress, the tent also describes how I see myself?

I can tell you exactly what I was thinking about before I had this dream. I thought my dream was purely a reflection of this. I was thinking about a patient who assaulted on of our nurses. It was the second one in as many weeks. I was bothered not so much by what happened, but my reaction to what happened. I wanted to hurt the patient for what she did. Only one time before have I ever felt this way- a drunk driver who critically injured a mom and her two kids.

I also was thinking about the validity and relevance of a book I had just read about healing trauma, specifically regarding memory. As I mentally went through the list of patients in my head, I got to the woman last March and it was too torturous to bear. I assumed the woman in my dream was her- an already dead, lifeless woman and the breaking of bones that I could not only see and hear but also feel. This falling woman in my dream revisited me while I was awake thinking about the baby. It was completely disturbing. If that's what a flashback is like for people, I feel for them.

Although not actually thinking about it, I was dreading the upcoming holidays with the family. I thought that is why they were in my dream. In a few of my dreams, there exists this lack of distinction between alive and dead. It's weird.

Anyway, thanks again. I also want to thank you for starting this group. Maybe it can be a place to dump what haunts me in my dreams as the trauma diary is a place for what haunts me in real life.

Take care, tude

 

[linasmom]

Tammy,

Thank you so much! It's so interesting that you told me about the negative stigma you felt about certain drugs you started taking because last week I made the decision to go off the Trazodone and go back to taking the Xanax for sleep because it has been the only thing that works, however, I felt guilty for doing so because there is such a negative stigma attached to Xanax since it has become a popular street drug. I told my therapist this and my family. I know that I shouldn't feel guilty for taking it, because it truly is the one med that works for me, but the guilt is still there.

I have done cocaine in my life (never crack) but I never crave it. I am concerned with the few extra pounds that I have put on though, since being on all the new meds.

With regards to "one uping" and the assistant representing one part of me - I think that I tend to want to one up myself, that once I've achieved something, it's still not good enough. I'm a perfectionist to a fault.

I do always feel alone, no matter how many people care for me or understand what I'm going through.

With regards to money, it could be my current situation since I recently stopped working. We are tight for cash but still making it. I do feel like I now have to prove myself somehow to my husband since I'm not bringing in money. And I'm not even sure what it is I have to prove.

I'm going to think about all of this some more and how it all the ideas are connected to one another.

Again, thank you and I think I'll post those other nightmares in here, too.

Best,
Rachel

 

[Lucky Laser]

Hello everyone! I've always been interested in my dreams since I was a little girl. I have a dream diary going back to 1998. A lot of my dreams are full stories and I could almost make a movie out of them. Anyway, here is one from the other day:

I was sitting in a long hallway with some people I knew. The hallway was gray and institutional, with the typical fluorescent lighting, and somewhat dingy and depressing. Suddenly I realized that I felt dizzy. I tried to stand, but my body fell limply back to the ground. I had no power. I felt like I was on the verge of passing out.

I looked around and saw that others were also laying on the floor. I tried harder to get up, only to have a wave of weakness and dizziness force me back down. Then I noticed a haze starting to fill the hallway. It was poisonous gas! If I didn't get out of there soon I would probably die!

I looked next to me and there was the body of someone I knew (either my husband or my best friend). I tried to shake him awake but it didn't work. I was suddenly struck by the awful choice I had. Either escape and leave someone I cared about to die, or stay there and surely die myself because I didn't have the strength to do anything. I didn't want to die, but I didn't want the guilt of knowing I'd left someone behind or the pain of living without him either.

I chose to try and leave... maybe I could get help in time before they all became hypoxic and died... but it felt so futile.

 

[Seeking_Nirvana]

hi tude, M*** is a reflection of yourself so maybe he/she is struggling more than you think. Perhaps not as much as you, but there is no way that he/she is unafraid and everything comes easy for them. They are just able to repress it to the point you don't notice, and I would bet M*** probably feels the same way about you. If you approached M*** and said, "How do you perceive me"? I bet he/she would say you are brave and seem to handle things with ease.

I did this to one of my co-workers. I asked her if she could tell I had PTSD. She stated she didn't know I had PTSD and thought I was strong but moody LOL. She said if I hadn't told her she would have never known anything was wrong. After that, I wished I had kept my mouth shut. However, I learned that things are not always as they seem and M*** may be struggling as much as you at times.

Also, I asked my son how his friends and their parents perceive me and he said they think your fine. He stated I was good at hiding it and acting normal, but he can tell I'm messed up (because he sees me when I'm feeling at my worst where I don't show that in public)

In my opinion I think the tent represented your psyche. It is a place where these people lived. If you lived in a cardboard box in a dream that would represent your psyche (it can be an apartment, mobile home, or anything as long as that is where you live. The tent is how I came up with the thought "you didn't feel needy but could use some moral support" because a tent is a bit unstable but the people were not suffering.

The mother and two kids in a tent seems to fit what happened to them, but I think also you were feeling a little unstable after remembering these happenings and that's why they/you were in a tent. You were able to identify your feelings about yourself through them.

I can certainly see how this dream is related to your experiences. I think you dream more logically as opposed to symbolic. But I still hold my belief that these people represent the way you feel to a certain degree. I see how the angry mob was a reflection toward the way you felt about the woman hurting a nurse. You probably felt strapped down like M*** in that you knew you couldn't do anything about it except be angry and want to hurt her.
I used to have a problem differentiating between people who were alive and dead but it seems that I don't have those issue anymore in dreams. Maybe once in a blue moon a case might pop up where I say "Your dead" I think these things work themselves out as we understand dreams and our fears.

One thought on this is that as I finally accepted the people I loved were dead (I was holding on to the pain of them being gone) they didn't show up in my dreams as dead anymore, but alive (because they still live inside of my heart in a more positive way, and I learned to let go of the negativity of their death). The more you learn to accept these things the easier it gets.

I'm glad you joined because I understand the apprehension to face dreams. I was there at one point. Dreams are like life when you face them they become less scary.

Take care
Tammy

 

[Seeking_Nirvana]

Hi Rachel, Wow, I'm glad I shared that situation with you. I was really worried when I was having crack and cocaine dreams, and couldn't figure it out for quite awhile. Then one day it hit me and I realized that stimulants are related to cocaine in a way, and I was substituting my fears of becoming addicted to a stimulant (I used to do cocaine) and the negativity people place on them. After I figured that out I think I only had one more dream searching for cocaine. The interesting thing is I never did the drug in my dreams. The closest I came to doing any drug in a dream was I placed crack rocks in between my teeth where my gums are LOL. It was so funny and stupid.

It's amazing how the mind works and how dreams substitute one thing for another in symbols. If I were you I wouldn't worry about what other people think as far as Xanax goes. You are the one who has to live your life with PTSD so they should have no say in what you take unless you start abusing it. But I certainly understand why you feel that way because I did the same thing. But I'm over it now and don't care what any one thinks. It would be nice not to have to take stimulants and hope at some point I can work with out them. But for the time being I'm doing what works.

The first part might be about the cop (justice with right and wrong) in you. How your dad dealt drugs and now you feel your doing something wrong with regard to drugs/Xanax. The money seemed obvious that there was a money problem but for some reason I thought there had to be a deeper meaning and made it more complicated than it was. Dreams can be tricky and they generally don't tell you straight out what they mean.

Keep in mind what the number 6 means in this dream. You said you were a perfectionist and that was one of the characteristics that number 6 holds.

I think you are correct about the assistant. Usually people in our dreams represent us and not other people. But please consider this; why would you be wanting to "one up" yourself unless you feel you have something to prove to others? Just food for thought there. You don't have to be perfect for other people to love you, especially your husband.

Take care and I look forward to helping you with your other dreams.
Tammy

 

[Seeking_Nirvana]

Hi Lucky Laser, In dreams death is not literal it is symbolic of change in the dreamers life. The dream starts out with you feeling depressed, lonely and powerless. Also, you're in a transitional phase (hallway) This transition is that you are starting to come out of these depressed feelings and you will have to leave some of your old habits and thoughts behind (dead bodies) in order to start thinking healthy.

In the dream the guilt that your leaving a loved one behind is really not that, but you feel your leaving yourself behind to die (change), but you have to in order to make that transition into a new and better feeling about yourself.

Change is an uncomfortable feeling and that is why you feel that it would be painful to leave him/yourself behind to die. For some reason most of us resist change even if it is for the better.

Basically what the dream is telling you is to let go of old thoughts and habits and adapt to new and healthy thinking even though it will feel uncomfortable. You have to push yourself to heal, and don't hold onto the past pain.

Hope this was helpful
Tammy

 

[samsara]

OK. Here's one I had a few days ago.
I don't usually remember my dreams but I texted this one to BB the minute i woke up so i remember it from my phone. I'll write it as I wrote it to him, it's easier.

I had this really vivid dream
Very detailed.
You kept sending me messages through one of those kitchen to wait staff conveyor belts, the one's you send food from the kitchen to the restaurant. The inside of it looked like a dishwasher and it had a chess board in it. So it functioned like a dishwasher but every time we closed it it left and went back to you like a chute.
At my end were the wait staff, they felt like they may have been your friends, some blokes who were laughing a lot as we sent things back to you.
For some reason I kept receiving, opening the dishwasher to receive it in my end, in my granny's kitchen (in reality she has a new house she moved next door to my parents a couple of years ago, she never had a dishwasher before this house). Anyway I kept receiving it through her dishwasher. We kept sending each other stuff, nothing I could define. And then some message game came through, a chess game. You wanted trinkets sent back. The last thing I sent you was a glass snoopy dog. You actually wanted chocolate. One of your mates had put in a chocolate penis, I was worried the chocolate would melt in the dishwasher so I sent you a random glass snoopy dog ornament that was just there, ready to put in. ( I have no idea where snoopy came from, he was never a figure of any part of my life but just thought I'd add that).
When I sent it back, I could hear you laughing really hard down the tunnel. then I woke up, to your text.