And I Thought Manic Depression Was Bad

[Punky143]

I don't have the longest list of diagnoses, but the ones on it are enough to turn professionals away and destroy any chance of having a "normal" life. I've had ptsd as one of my diagnosis for years, made sense based on how I was raised and that was that. Simple right? Yea, I thought so but I couldn't be more wrong. Having mental health issues in general sucks but having some specific ones like DID really suck because for me it's thrust me into isolation and the whole "abandonment" issue along with trust, shame, anger and eventually horrible sadness that no one would understand and from that point always look at me differently. That is what I struggle to find out where I belong, where we belong because right now, it's no where.

 

[Adrian2016]

I know the feeling. Come close to those that you can trust, and those that you know love you....I know for many that is no easy task...ptsd leads to isolation...so finding that person can be challenging....but when you do...i find they can often be the best source of reminding you who you really are...beyond your diagnoses..of reminding you all the things you can be again

 

[Punky143]

Unfortunately, I don't have that special someone who will be beside me during this battle. I thought I did up until very recently when my loyalty was broken and now it's just not the same. I've made the mistake of confiding in what I thought were friends but I was foolish and embarrassed. I don't have that good ole childhood friend others brag about. I had friends growing up but they wouldn't last long until I'd move onto someone else. Strange. So for now, I ride the storm alone trying to look and act as normal as we can but I think we aren't as good as we thought

 

[ladee]

@Punky143 , but you are here !!! And I am very grateful and happy about that. In this sense, you are not alone. No we don't get to set and have face to face coffee and talk, but we are here for you. Many of us are isolated. Choice or circumstances, doesn't matter.
So happy you are here with us... am sending you gentle welcome hugs if you accept.. If not ready for hugs, put them on a shelf and take one as needed... they have a lifetime guarantee....:hug:

 

[Punky143]

Thank you. I air in caution when reading your post because so much of us wants to believe it's true but, it's not smart to just jump in. Please, it's not personal and I don't like giving others a hard time either. I do have this forum and have found it to be a comfort since no one in the everyday life can know.

 

[ladee]

You are approaching it like I did... trust has to be built... and I appreciate your attitude. You are being honest from the start... that is great. Promise you I did not take it personal... set your own pace.... we are here when you are ready...

 

[Ocean5]

Welcome to site. Take your time. Lots of information on here. And yes many of us isolated situations - by choice, disorder, circumstances, or combo.

Want to make sure you are talking D.I.D. correct? Before I respond.

 

[Punky143]

Welcome to site. Take your time. Lots of information on here. And yes many of us isolated situations - b...

Yes, DID plus BPD and more. Two very complicated dx that often times professionals immediately have assumptions and judgments about. In the past I've chosen to leave BPD out of my medical hx because I want to be treated as "normal" as everyone else because I've heard what others have said about those who carry that dx and it stinks.