Anxiety so bad I cant even drive or think straight


New Here
I had some shocking news about a friends ex on the weekend, I don't even know the man but it brought me flashbacks, intrusive thoughts, anxiety, worries, everything really.

I keep telling myself to grow a spine and get on with things but when I think of driving (new driver passed in june) I get these thoughts of crashing into someone whether they be in a car or a pedestrian or someone crashing into me. I've never been in an accident of any kind with a car, closest I've been is not putting hand brake on and rolling back a few inches for a second.

I hate myself right now because I don't feel settled anywhere, not in my boyfriends, not on my own, I can't see my friends because I can't get in the car and I've made myself a prisoner in my boyfriends for the past few days. I feel so guilty that I'm not spending time with loved ones.

I have tried pretty much every prescribed drug for months at a time for each tablet and I can't go down that route anymore. I've had hundreds of hours of counselling and I've had a fair few hypnotherapy sessions too.

I'm isolated in my own mind and can't switch it off.

Maybe more counselling or a driving lesson in my car? I'm at a loss. I can barely get myself out of bed.

Prisoner in my own mind, I hate myself and I don't know what to do.

Any advice would be great especially with the driving.
I personally wouldn’t be prioritising getting behind the wheel in a giant machine and start steering round while my anxiety was that unstable.

Which is not what you want to hear, but safety first, yeah?

You mentioned in another thread some ‘drastic’ lifestyle changes you recently made. Perhaps working with a therapist on just regaining some stability might be helpful?