Hi sorry this is a little late to respond, but I saw this and can relate. I'm a supporter and I too have been dealing with PTSD coming between my husband and I for about 5 years. Thank you for sharing because it helps me see the other side and reminds me to have empathy. In fact empathy is the one big thing I think is key to staying connected after a blow up. I don't want an apology after a blow up because for me, that feels superficial and ultimately I know that my husband truly does not want to behave that way and is bothered by the things he says or does during an episode. However, I do ask for empathy and understanding. Just to hear him affirm that knows how hard it can be for me, the exhaustion, and acknowledging that sometimes I will be angry too with the whole situation, helps me just kind of relax. We get past hurts quicker this way when he empathizes and understands that PTSD is hard not just for him anymore but our whole family. He still feels like it is his burden to bear most of the time but I continue to talk about PTSD like an outsider who comes in and messes things up between us and I think he appreciates this because it takes the blame off of him. I hope your husband can come to think of PTSD as not you acting that way, but really like an outside party that gets between you two. Try to stay connected through empathy, acknowleging how hard it is for him and how you understand his anger. Let him have his angry feelings because he will have to work through his issues of resentment on his own; that is not your burden to bear.
