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As Christmas Approaches... I find myself feeling a sense of impeding doom.

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keystonegirl

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As Christmas approaches, I find myself feeling a sense of impeding doom. Although I'm concerned, almost bordering on frightened, I'm also fascinated by my thoughts on this matter. I can't quite put my finger on why I feel this way. I've started practicing mindfulness techniques, guided meditation, and grounding in the here and now. I'm also working on silencing my inner critic which seems to spotlight my fears. It's as if there's an entity slowing surrounding me and encroaching on my personal space. This has driven me to distraction at times. But it's the primal fear that I feel; it gets stronger, longer, and louder as each day passes towards that one day in late December. I'm slowly coming to the realization that Christmas has a central role in some of my PTSD flashbacks. I'd like to bury my head in the sand; but that would be counterproductive to learning how to deal with these issues. This issue has recently arisen from learning about my PTSD and dealing with other issues involved with it. I think I need to examine this and try to find a solution. If not a solution at least a way to mitigate the reactions it provokes in me. 🤶
 
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Right, the present moment is just that. The future is the one that promotes the doom and gloom. How would I know? I’m treading , wading through, along the same path. Trying to make new inroads, diverting away from the idea that it is a horrible season. One that measures out the dread of many things. What’s attached to this holiday? Many things. Each year it either gets better or worse, or unravels more that doesn’t need to keep being brought forward. I go from avoidance to trying to make new paths. Create it in a way that I’m comfortable with it. The background noise gets overwhelming. Your post reminds me I’m not alone in this mess. Thanks for the share.
 
Probably seems like way too easy an explanation but -

Holidays=stress, More stress = increased PTSD symptoms, PTSD is anxiety based so it feeds on and amplifies that because that's what its good at..........

We heal in community, so spend some time in the Social threads. When I participate there - I find a smile sooner or later because you have to stop ruminating to post and when you start focusing on other things........
 
As Christmas approaches, I find myself feeling a sense of impeding doom.

But it's the primal fear that I feel; it gets stronger, longer, and louder as each day passes towards that one day in late December.
I have this feeling all the time. I mean, every single day. Interestingly, the holidays don't make it worse--I think because it was the only time everyone in my family actually got along. But I do think it's common for many to notice an increase in symptoms as they approach a holiday.

Mindfulness also really helps me stay out of my head, but I notice that sense of doom is harder to put aside. For me, I don't connect any particular thoughts to it, so I try to just move through it. When it's constant, though, it's hard.

It's as if there's an entity slowing surrounding me and encroaching on my personal space.
This is a great way to describe it. I'm sorry you are having to deal with it, but it sounds like you are really working hard to figure it out and manage it.
 
I have been getting this too. Mine comes from violent Christmas in the past because of an ex who is bipolar. I cried about it last night and thought I would be better this morning. But was feeling sad just now. Then I told myself I'm not going to let him ruin another holiday. I used to love Christmas and I'm going to again. Wish me luck or prayers.
 
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