Being Raped In My Dreams

[Abeille]

Almost every night, my dreams involve me being raped or physically abused in some way and not always by the men who did rape me. I can feel everything that happens in my dreams as if it were real. I cannot control my dreams either, even when I know it is a dream. Does anyone have any "tricks" that worked for them to prevent this type or similar dreams?

 

[Jade-]

I was also having rape dreams almost every night. Once I finally talked to my T. about being raped, the dreams have subsided quite a bit. I still have them, but not all the time anymore.

 

[disconnect]

Have you been talking about past incidents to anyone recently? They maybe happening because you've been opening up about what has happened to you? Or it could be the opposite - they maybe happening because you are trying to bury the memories and it's your brains way of telling you that it's time to open up about what has happened? Also, I'm big into interpretting dreams - having dreams such as these indicates you're feeling violated and victimized in your waking life.

I don't know how to stop the nightmares, or how to make them happen less frequently. I find that if I talk about specific nightmares with my T, we can talk about possible meanings together. It always helps to have a rational opinion to interpret them in a way that valids how I feel.
D/x

 

[Abeille]

I have flashbacks almost every day and in the past few days they have been worse than usual... I am sick all the time... I talk to my fiancee about the flashbacks and if they happen while we are on the phone he helps me through them. I have tried telling him and not telling him t see if it effects the dreams but it hasn't... I am so afraid to go to sleep because I am afraid I am going to be raped all over again, when I close my eyes at bed time, fear washes over me and it makes me restless... The only time I have had a break from it is when I have shared a bed with my fiancee...

What you said about me feeling violated and victemized in my waking life is very much true. My parents never are glad with what I do and are not very supportive. They treat me like their slave and make me do everything around the house and get them food and drink. That is not a big deal, I just wish that they would help a little bit and that they would be grateful and aknowledge what I do... It just feels like everyone I love, everyone I care for hurts me... Even my fiancee does, he does not mean to, he hates doing it, but he hurts me all the time...

 

[disconnect]

This could be a reason the dreams are happening and your brain is connecting the feelings to the rape. I relate to the feeling of being too scared to sleep. It's horrible, because I feel like I'm trapped inside myself.

Do you like massage? Or just having your fiancee stroke your hair to help you relax and fall asleep? I know contact is difficult at times and obviously if you're not comfortable or it triggers you, avoid it, but I sometimes find connecting myself to my boyfriend by listening to his breathing, or laying my head on his chest and listening to his heartbeat can calm me down enough to sleep.

I'm sorry if this doesn't help much..
D/x

 

[Abeille]

That is an interesting notion....

And, doing that always helps, but we live 8 hrs apart so tht cannot happen most of the time. Lately, on bad nights he will hum to me until I can get to sleep.

It is good to just talk about it, thank you.

Abeille