Hi there, I have been in here reading and reading for a few weeks now and I feel I am now ready to post to help me overcome this grief I feel at the moment :,(
I know my husband has been struggling now for a good while. He is ex RAF and served 23 years and was de mobbed just over 4 years ago. I knew it was going to be a struggle for him but he seemed to be coping okay. He has hated every job he has had since leaving and for the past two years has been working away from home.
It has been hard but I thought we had maintained the bond we have, btw we are 15 years married.
He had been trying to get work back home during these 2 years. I knew he was struggling over the last few months with anxiety lack of sleep ect...we have such a lovely relationship just that quirky little bond, love spending time together and love laughing together...this man worshipped me as I do him. I told him I was here for him anytime any hour of the day. On his last visit home 4 weeks ago he never spoke or came near me for 4 days..got up on the Saturday packed his bag and left a day early...he told me he had to get away, I was gutted to say the least but let him go.
He then rang half way through his journey and told me he was sorry but he just couldn't be around me he hadn't missed me this time! I was devastated.
Over the last few weeks things have gotten worse he didn't want to talk over the phone and texts where very short...I felt I was losing him rapidly! It was like talking to a stranger...he had been offered a job back home which I thought that's all he had wanted for the last 2 years, he then expressed he didn't know if he wanted to come home or be with me anymore!
He has been seeing a therapist for at least 7 weeks which I was over the moon with. Then nearly two weeks ago I got a message from his land lady saying she had kicked him out as she couldn't handle the atmosphere any longer...I immediately rang him to see what was going on. He told me she had of accused him of having a affair with a girl who also lives in the lodgings! Well the penny dropped for me there and then, I asked him where he was going to go and he said the girl who he had been accused of having affair with had sorted him a room with a friend and her husband but she was moving in too!!
I was livid..I begged him to come home...his coldness has cut me too the bone! He then told me they have been having days out and such since august and that he has feelings for her which he has told her about and it was not felt the other way...so he has been having a emotional affair for months I feel like he has been hedging his bets and is coming home tomorrow to start a new job but thinks he has done nothing wrong because there was no sex!! I have dropped 28lb in 4 weeks been on the verge of panic and he couldn't give 1 shit about me! I don't know what is coming home to me in the next 24 hours I am ill :( sorry if this seems to jump all over the place but that's how my head feels at the moment! I feel like someone has died. Any advice greatly appreciated x
I know my husband has been struggling now for a good while. He is ex RAF and served 23 years and was de mobbed just over 4 years ago. I knew it was going to be a struggle for him but he seemed to be coping okay. He has hated every job he has had since leaving and for the past two years has been working away from home.
It has been hard but I thought we had maintained the bond we have, btw we are 15 years married.
He had been trying to get work back home during these 2 years. I knew he was struggling over the last few months with anxiety lack of sleep ect...we have such a lovely relationship just that quirky little bond, love spending time together and love laughing together...this man worshipped me as I do him. I told him I was here for him anytime any hour of the day. On his last visit home 4 weeks ago he never spoke or came near me for 4 days..got up on the Saturday packed his bag and left a day early...he told me he had to get away, I was gutted to say the least but let him go.
He then rang half way through his journey and told me he was sorry but he just couldn't be around me he hadn't missed me this time! I was devastated.
Over the last few weeks things have gotten worse he didn't want to talk over the phone and texts where very short...I felt I was losing him rapidly! It was like talking to a stranger...he had been offered a job back home which I thought that's all he had wanted for the last 2 years, he then expressed he didn't know if he wanted to come home or be with me anymore!
He has been seeing a therapist for at least 7 weeks which I was over the moon with. Then nearly two weeks ago I got a message from his land lady saying she had kicked him out as she couldn't handle the atmosphere any longer...I immediately rang him to see what was going on. He told me she had of accused him of having a affair with a girl who also lives in the lodgings! Well the penny dropped for me there and then, I asked him where he was going to go and he said the girl who he had been accused of having affair with had sorted him a room with a friend and her husband but she was moving in too!!
I was livid..I begged him to come home...his coldness has cut me too the bone! He then told me they have been having days out and such since august and that he has feelings for her which he has told her about and it was not felt the other way...so he has been having a emotional affair for months I feel like he has been hedging his bets and is coming home tomorrow to start a new job but thinks he has done nothing wrong because there was no sex!! I have dropped 28lb in 4 weeks been on the verge of panic and he couldn't give 1 shit about me! I don't know what is coming home to me in the next 24 hours I am ill :( sorry if this seems to jump all over the place but that's how my head feels at the moment! I feel like someone has died. Any advice greatly appreciated x
